I ran across a forum where pds post.

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Stevie

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I ran across a forum where pds post.
« on: September 18, 2013, 03:39:58 PM »
I hope I am posting this on the appropriate forum.  If not, please transfer it to the right place.  Thank you very much.

While browsing the PsychCentral forum under pds, I didn't realize pds were posting there.  It's a real eye opener.  I am not sure if the posters are truly diagnosed pds, but their questions sound like things a Pd would say.  One Pd poster goes on to lament how inconvenient it is that everyone falls in love with them.  They continue to remark that they do not want to change, because they love the way they can dismiss relationships, and go on to the next conquest.  Several other Pd respondents agreed.  One savvy non Pd told the OP that if they would show their true personality at the beginning, they wouldn't have this problem anymore, LOL.  I loved that answer.  The Pd sense of entitlement really shines through.  I am sorry, but I don 't know how to attach a clickable link for a site.

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Thorn bird

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Re: I ran across a forum where pds post.
« Reply #1 on: September 18, 2013, 03:45:38 PM »
Thanks Stevie I'll check it out probably not too many NPD's though - but would be interesting to take a peep ::)
The bird with the thorn in it's breast is driven by it knows not what to impale itself and die singing. But when we put thorns in our breast we know, we understand. And still we do it. Still we do it.

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Hope5

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Re: I ran across a forum where pds post.
« Reply #2 on: September 18, 2013, 04:32:05 PM »
Stevie

This is so interesting, OK I checked it out. and what caught my eye was someone also posted if PD's can love their children. Which is a big issue with my thinking right now.

 A non replied"He may be narcissistic and proud of having a daughter who emulates him. I think the pride can look like love. He may not have had the same feelings if she didn't meet his expectations. "

So I have always thought he only showed love if they showed interest in his likes, etc. And this makes so much sense. Reading what some  of the PD's said could actually give a little insight maybe.

Quote
The Pd sense of entitlement really shines through.

I really see this as well. I have slept on the couch a few months now. Because of all his issues, and what he has caused to our family. And what he took out of it was "I'm being physically rejected by my wife, and I haven't done anything."  :doh: Seriously I would love if he posted on a sight like this. I would like to read about how he actually sees himself. Because he truly believes hes entitled to intimacy when he is abusive in the same day. :stars:


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Stevie

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Re: I ran across a forum where pds post.
« Reply #3 on: September 18, 2013, 04:49:51 PM »
Thorn bird - Yes, see if anything rings true to you.

Hope - That makes sense about having pride in a child who emulates them.  It is definitely conditional love.  I am so sorry to hear about your husband.  I swear, you could tell a Pd 50,000 times what is wrong, and they are entirely blameless, or just do not "understand ".  It is truly exhausting.

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Hope5

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Re: I ran across a forum where pds post.
« Reply #4 on: September 18, 2013, 05:03:29 PM »
Thanks Stevie

I know, and while they are clueless they still manage to spit out insults. And then wonder why you aren't interested in them anyway.

I am so glad you found this sight :yes:


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loveable

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Re: I ran across a forum where pds post.
« Reply #5 on: September 18, 2013, 09:39:51 PM »
And to think I almost signed up to join that forum.  "Whew", dodge that bullet.  ::)

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Oneness

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Re: I ran across a forum where pds post.
« Reply #6 on: September 18, 2013, 09:54:23 PM »
I did join that forum and read over there for a while...only in the nons section...but it seems the BPD persons liked to come over to the non threads and create havoc....generally, I found it not a good fit for me. I like it much better here.  ;D

I have sent some PDs who came to OOTF looking for help with themselves over to psychforums....don't know if it worked out for them, but wanted to be helpful...and get them off our board before anything happened that hurt them or hurt our safe haven community here....
It's better to love and lost, then to live with a psycho for the rest of your life.

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Joan

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Re: I ran across a forum where pds post.
« Reply #7 on: September 18, 2013, 09:57:02 PM »
Stevie, I have read it one day and I have to disagree with you. Its not an "eye-opener". Its more like "back of the neck hair raiser". The sadism and meaness are there in all their glory. What I read was appaling. I feel sorry for the ones who live/ socialize with them, but Im more sorry for themselves if they believe thats a good way to live. They really deserve my pity.

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Hope5

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Re: I ran across a forum where pds post.
« Reply #8 on: September 18, 2013, 10:05:09 PM »
Christina :thumbup:

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Stevie

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Re: I ran across a forum where pds post.
« Reply #9 on: September 18, 2013, 10:19:32 PM »
Loveable - I think non pds can post there too, but I am unsure if both post on the same threads.

Oneness - That was very smart and helpful for you to refer them to that site.  That way they are among like minded people.  Good thinking.  I also enjoy this site very much.  I feel very lucky to have found my way here.

Cristina - Yes, they definitely act as if their selfish and entitled way of thinking is fine.  In fact on the one thread the self -identified Pd requested that only other pds need reply.  I guess some of them not only want to do whatever the heck they want, but want no disagreement on an Internet forum, LOL.  I think I am attracted to the site, because it's rare for pds to express their thoughts so openly.  You are right.   They are mean and sadistic.

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moglow

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Re: I ran across a forum where pds post.
« Reply #10 on: September 19, 2013, 11:24:43 AM »
Quote from: Stevie
I guess some of them not only want to do whatever the heck they want, but want no disagreement on an Internet forum

Honestly, I've seen some of the same here at OotF from presumed non-PDs.  At times there appears to be a mindset that "I'm a victim so I'm going to say and do whatever I want, and nobody better disagree with me.  I deserve to fight back any way I can!"  I guarantee there are PD individuals who see themselves as victims [I'd say my mother is one], and thereby justify their own misbehavior as defending themselves against some attack.  Never mind they're lashing out against the very people who would be most willing to reach out to them if they'd change their approach ...
 
I'd venture a guess that those posts you read were written by people who were diagnosed but had no intention of pursuing any kind of treatment or recovery.  One forum I really like is bpdrecovery.com - it's ALL about recovery there and owning your own stuff, whether you are diagnosed or not.  They don't tolerate pity parties or tantrums there, you either work on yourself and your behavior or you get the hell out.

 
« Last Edit: September 19, 2013, 11:28:23 AM by moglow »
“Nothing exposes our true self more than how we treat each other in the home.”  ~ Joseph B. Wirthlin

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Joan

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Re: I ran across a forum where pds post.
« Reply #11 on: September 19, 2013, 12:39:46 PM »
Moglow,

I have seen the same here too, from presumed nons. The "Im a victim" card goes a long way in justifications and gives a carte blanche for appaling behaviour. Or so they think.

Ill check the link, I cannot stand pity parties nor tantrums. Its been bothering me for some time, hence my post on enabling.


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moglow

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Re: I ran across a forum where pds post.
« Reply #12 on: September 19, 2013, 01:06:44 PM »
BPDrecovery is an excellent forum - many of their tools and discussions apply whether one is BPD or not.  We've "borrowed" some of their tools and often recommend them to people from all walks of life.  Their focus is looking to yourself, your own behavior and what you can do to change it and thereby improve your life, not picking apart others' behavior for what they're doing wrong.  Sometimes we all need that change of focus.  :yes:
 
 
 
“Nothing exposes our true self more than how we treat each other in the home.”  ~ Joseph B. Wirthlin

Stop Stinkin' Thinkin'!

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Stevie

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Re: I ran across a forum where pds post.
« Reply #13 on: September 19, 2013, 01:59:46 PM »
Thanks Cristina and moglow.  I am going to check that site.  It sounds like they brook no Pd justifications and nonsense on there.  Refreshing!

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Thorn bird

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Re: I ran across a forum where pds post.
« Reply #14 on: September 19, 2013, 02:42:15 PM »
Stevie can you let me have the link? you don't need to join to read posts do you? :no:
The bird with the thorn in it's breast is driven by it knows not what to impale itself and die singing. But when we put thorns in our breast we know, we understand. And still we do it. Still we do it.

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Stevie

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Re: I ran across a forum where pds post.
« Reply #15 on: September 19, 2013, 07:55:49 PM »
Thorn bird - I think if you Google PsychCentral you will get there.  There is a heading for personality disorders.  I am sorry, but I do not know how to post a clickable link.  I am so techno challenged, grrrrrrrrrrrr.  Please let me know if you cannot find it.

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Stevie

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Re: I ran across a forum where pds post.
« Reply #16 on: September 19, 2013, 07:59:21 PM »
Thorn bird - forumspsychcentral.com.  If it doesn't work let me know.  It is on PsychCentral.

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Thorn bird

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Re: I ran across a forum where pds post.
« Reply #17 on: September 19, 2013, 09:10:20 PM »
Thank you Stevie will give it a try and let you know :)
The bird with the thorn in it's breast is driven by it knows not what to impale itself and die singing. But when we put thorns in our breast we know, we understand. And still we do it. Still we do it.

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Survivor43

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Re: I ran across a forum where pds post.
« Reply #18 on: September 20, 2013, 12:01:09 PM »
where is the link?

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Oneness

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Re: I ran across a forum where pds post.
« Reply #19 on: September 20, 2013, 03:07:44 PM »
This is the link for the Psych Forums I joined.

http://www.psychforums.com/
It's better to love and lost, then to live with a psycho for the rest of your life.

If your presence can't add value to my life, your absence will make no difference.