UK Dads

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judithr

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Re: UK Dads
« Reply #15 on: February 02, 2017, 05:49:30 PM »
My son has been living in the U.K. for the past dozen years and has been married for the past 6; they have a pre-schooler and a new baby. When they married,  she seemed slightly anxious with a little OCD but since the first pregnancy, she has become more and more difficult, throwing public tantrums like a toddler, belittling him in front of the kids, accusing him of having affairs, texting and calling him endlessly at work, and even hitting him. My son's European father also lives in the U.K. and his sister is there frequently for work, so he does have some family support, but his wife does her best to isolate him and her parents blame him. And to top it off, he is the family's sole support and financially struggling. This past summer I sent a book on living with someone with BPD to him at his office and he took it home, where she found it, so she is punishing me by refusing to let me see their children, including the new baby. It's very hard not to take this personally even though intellectually  I know she is deliberately doing this to drive a wedge between us.
Any suggestions on how to help him and the kids? I live on another continent.
« Last Edit: February 02, 2017, 05:55:55 PM by judithr »

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littlemisssunshine

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Re: UK Dads
« Reply #16 on: February 24, 2017, 03:42:45 AM »
Hi, as female in the uk with a non diagnosed but i strongly suspect narcissistic personality disordered mother, i totally emphasise with you brave men, your lives sound like a living hell and my heart goes out to you all. I have watched one of my husbands friends be put through a living hell after he split with a horrid women. What I don't understand is why the men in most relationships that finish when there are kids end up being ripped off so badly financially it makes me mad, we are suppose to live in a equal society now a days but clearly this is bullsxxt why the women can't work and everything be equal is completely beyond me.

Sending love and hugs to you all.

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Crushed_Dad

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Re: UK Dads
« Reply #17 on: April 18, 2017, 04:26:16 AM »
My son has been living in the U.K. for the past dozen years and has been married for the past 6; they have a pre-schooler and a new baby. When they married,  she seemed slightly anxious with a little OCD but since the first pregnancy, she has become more and more difficult, throwing public tantrums like a toddler, belittling him in front of the kids, accusing him of having affairs, texting and calling him endlessly at work, and even hitting him. My son's European father also lives in the U.K. and his sister is there frequently for work, so he does have some family support, but his wife does her best to isolate him and her parents blame him. And to top it off, he is the family's sole support and financially struggling. This past summer I sent a book on living with someone with BPD to him at his office and he took it home, where she found it, so she is punishing me by refusing to let me see their children, including the new baby. It's very hard not to take this personally even though intellectually  I know she is deliberately doing this to drive a wedge between us.
Any suggestions on how to help him and the kids? I live on another continent.

Sounds so similar to my situation and wife. Only thing to do is leave but it's the hardest thing to do, I try and get by as best I can but have moments of absolute fury when I see what my life has become and how she's dragging us all down to her level.

I'd certainly love to leave but closeness to my kids and relative financial comfort stops me. I have no attraction to my wife anymore.