Book Recomendation!!!

[MargaritaBulgakov]

I just finished a beautiful poetic memoir, "Educated" by Tara Westover.

I friend had emailed me a link to the story half-jokingly asking me if I had written it with a pseudo-name.

If only I could write so well!!

Much of the story was eerily similar to mine. But there were differences big and small.

In any case, Tara tells her story of growing up in a dysfunctional family in three parts, childhood, off to college, and the ultimate break up followed by the aftermath. I find the final part of her story to be cathartic as it relates to much of what I've been going through this past year.

Here is a quote:

"Peace did not come easily. I spent two years enumerating my father's flaws, constantly updating the tally, as if every resentment, every real and imagined act of cruelty, of neglect, would justify my decision to cut him from my life. Once justified, I thought the strangling guilt would release me and I could catch my breath.

"But vindication has no power over guilt. No amount of anger or rage directed at others can subdue it, because guilt is never about THEM. Guilt is the fear of one's own wretchedness. It has nothing to do with other people.

"I shed my guilt when I accepted my decision on its own terms, without endlessly prosecuting old grievances, without weighing his sins against mine. Without thinking of my father at all. I learned to accept my decision for my own sake, because of me, not because of him. Because I needed it, not because he deserved it.

"It was the only way I could love him."

[bloomie]

Thanks for the recommend. Sounds like a validating read.

[Qilin~]

Thank you, I am looking forward to reading it.

[blues_cruise]

Here is a quote:

"Peace did not come easily. I spent two years enumerating my father's flaws, constantly updating the tally, as if every resentment, every real and imagined act of cruelty, of neglect, would justify my decision to cut him from my life. Once justified, I thought the strangling guilt would release me and I could catch my breath.

"But vindication has no power over guilt. No amount of anger or rage directed at others can subdue it, because guilt is never about THEM. Guilt is the fear of one's own wretchedness. It has nothing to do with other people.

"I shed my guilt when I accepted my decision on its own terms, without endlessly prosecuting old grievances, without weighing his sins against mine. Without thinking of my father at all. I learned to accept my decision for my own sake, because of me, not because of him. Because I needed it, not because he deserved it.

"It was the only way I could love him."

Thats powerful. The first part is exactly what I keep doing, like doing it for my own mental and physical health isn't enough and I have to justify it by listing everything. I've put this on my reading list as it sounds inspiring, thanks for sharing!

[bloomie]

MargaritaBulgakov - I hope it is okay that we moved this over to book reviews so others can see it.