Here to heal, prevent and learn from others

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Johnwt73

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Here to heal, prevent and learn from others
« on: August 12, 2018, 07:34:42 PM »
Hello everyone,

Just started round 5 of no-contact with my ex and closed all the loopholes she found to Hoover me back to her to repeat the chaotic circle all over again. Hopefully I can be successful this time.

My previous two relationships have been disasterous and have beaten me down to literally nothing. Both had different ways of doing their gaslighting but both seemed to follow the same script and patterns and achieved the same results. I have done a little research previously, going to therapy now and taking time to reflect and heal.

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xredshoesx

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Re: Here to heal, prevent and learn from others
« Reply #1 on: August 12, 2018, 09:34:43 PM »
welcome to the forum-

being out is sometimes just as hard as being in from my experience with my ex.    after multiple rounds of break ups and take backs, he hoovered me strong for about 2 months after THE FINAL AND I MEAN IT breakup.  the last time was at a friend's funeral and it was painfully obvious he was trying to make it more about him and his feels than the decedent....

if you are feeling low, please do check out the toolbox for resources you can use in navigation of this tricky time.  the grey rock/ medium chill response may be helpful to you.  good boards to post on when you are ready to share more would be the separating/ divorcing  and common behaviors, many folks find reading/ sharing them help them avoid uPD/PD as they share about red flags and things they can do different if in the same position again.

hope to see you on the boards soon!

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Johnwt73

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Re: Here to heal, prevent and learn from others
« Reply #2 on: August 13, 2018, 02:23:33 AM »
Thank you very much for welcoming me and pointing me in the right direction. 

I can honestly say this is seriously the hardest thing Iíve had experience and do in my life and I am a 3 tour combat veteran. Being systematically dismantled, discarded, lured back in, rinse and repeat by someone Iíve invested 110% of my heart Into all while not even realizing it was happening to me until it was to late and I didnít even recognize myself is a really hard pill to swallow and accept.

I am going to do it right this time!

Cheers!
« Last Edit: August 13, 2018, 02:26:45 AM by Johnwt73 »