Struggling

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KeepingMyBlue

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Struggling
« on: August 31, 2018, 09:34:13 PM »
I'm struggling to mind my own business. I don't know even half of the story.
I'm in a restaurant.
I do know a young girl just wailed, "YOU HURT MY FEELINGS!" and started crying. I looked up and 3 family members were laughing.  Seconds later, she was curled up in mom's lap, but I never forgot moments like that.

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Solong

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Re: Struggling
« Reply #1 on: September 01, 2018, 02:55:46 PM »
Oh, that’s triggering to me. My FOO consistently showed misattunement to emotions. I was deemed as “dramatic” and “too x” all the time and for showing any emotion.

I work with children now and have the opportunity every day to validate their feelings. It makes me feel better about my place in the world.

Perhaps consider seeking out an opportunity to be/validate children, if this is such a trigger for you.

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Orthocone

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Re: Struggling
« Reply #2 on: September 01, 2018, 03:09:18 PM »
Something happened to me earlier this year, where I was stuck in the elevator with two people in my building.  My neighbor was telling this little boy off, telling him he can't disrespect his mother and that he'll be in trouble if he hears from his mother that he's been misbehaving again.  Wow, it was hard to bite my tongue on that one. 

First of all, what kind of mother makes her kid live with bedbugs and cockroaches?  Second, who is she to drag some random person into her family issues to play the martyr mom?  If she would've fucked the right guy, maybe, just maybe, she'd have had a willing participant who had socially acceptable control over the boy.  Oh man, really almost bit holes in my tongue over that one!
"You know makes the night so beautiful?  That the galaxy had a chance to sit in darkness, but it decided to let stars shine bright."-S D-B

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KeepingMyBlue

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Re: Struggling
« Reply #3 on: September 08, 2018, 08:52:38 PM »
Bless you, Solong, for being the change you want to see!

Thanks, Orthocone! It helps to know I'm not alone, and I agree.  Whatever martyr mom's situation, that kid didn't ask to be victim of it any more than we did.

Sometimes this group is the only place I can vent this kind of stuff and know someone is listening, and someone gets it.


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Gaining Clarity

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Re: Struggling
« Reply #4 on: September 08, 2018, 11:17:51 PM »
Ugh! Like others, incidents like this are so triggering. I thought of the times that I sat at our kitchen table trying to say something and my FOO would continuously talk over me, the more upset I got, the more they did it.

Why, oh, why do grown human beings think it's okay to pick on a child. So cowardly.


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Salsera

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Re: Struggling
« Reply #5 on: September 09, 2018, 04:00:04 AM »


Why, oh, why do grown human beings think it's okay to pick on a child.

Because they are sick.
"Faith is taking the first step even when you don’t see the whole staircase." - Martin Luther King, Jr.
"Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter." - Martin Luther King, Jr.

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Gaining Clarity

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Re: Struggling
« Reply #6 on: September 09, 2018, 11:29:43 AM »
Very true