Celebrate Recovery-Has anyone tried it for overcoming Codependency?

[Mary]

Hi Out of the FOG friends,
I have gone to a couple of Christian Celebrate Recovery evenings recently to work on my codependency and caretaking. They start with worship, then do teaching/testimonies, and follow up with group sharing time. Has anyone participated in this? Have you found it helpful in the long run?
Thanks,
Mary

[tragedy or hope]

Mary,

I have not. I have been to many kinds of 12 step groups. I have read much about how they got started. The steps are based on the principles of scripture. The original self help groups came out of Oxford. The originator (a pastor) had only 8 questions on his original list, others were added by Bill W. of AA (as I understand) because when Bill presented Jesus to some of those still addicted in hospitals, they did not want to hear "God talk."

They way around that pride was to get them to first admit they were powerless over alcohol; step one... came to believe a power greater than themselves could restore them to sanity; step two, and by the 3rd step they could admit they needed to turn their will and their lives over to the care of God "as they understood HIM." This is still in the 12 steps even though people interpret this step incorrectly and now annd can assume a tree is their God if they wish. That is NOT what that step means or even says.

I have heard that you may kind of graduate from Celebrate. People I know who come to the Anonymous 12 step programs feel it offers much more support and practical help.

I see nothing wrong with the original Anonymous 12 step groups. I have done my research on it to be connvinced in my own heart. It has saved my life and actually increased my faith in many ways. NO WHERE have I ever been a party to such frank and honest discussions. Many people do come to Christ through the steps,,, on their own.e

Celebrate is something of reinventing the wheel. Don't let people who have never experiennced a

[thedoghousedweller]

Mary, I have been through the 12 step program of Celebrate Recovery and it helped me very much.  Codependency was one of the issues that I worked on. 

The process forces a person to think back and catalog a lot of the experiences that led to a codependent state ( or depression or addiction or whatever).  In the process, a person reasons through their behaviors to understand what is a reaction and what is rational. 

I found the program to be an important step in my recovery.  I still attend on a regular basis for open share, which brings accountability. 

DHD

[BeautifulCrazy]

Mary,

I am hoping you update this post sometime to let us know about your experience!

[Mary]

One thing I am learning is that codependency is being addicted to the unhealthy person (ie. addict). In the sessions I see other people admitting it and calling it "people pleasing." I have a long way to go.

I am reading the Christian Codependency Recovery workbook that is also challenging me along these lines. I am realizing that I struggle with this perhaps from sharing a bedroom with a uPD sister growing up. She was downright nasty and jealous and harbored ill will towards me. Yet I desperately longed for her friendship and tried so hard to get along. I guess I developed a pattern of appeasing, pleasing, and feeling responsible for the tenor of the relationship. It's refreshing to look back and cast off that guilt. Ditto for my marriage relationship to uPDh.

Another thing I am learning is that by trying to fix situations I am being a controller. I'm really struggling with how to not control finances. I know handing over a certain card would be truly unwise, bit here I am considering it to keep him happy. Ugh. I'm praying for grace and protection in it.
Thanks for checking in on me.
Mary

[thedoghousedweller]

Mary, excellent work.   That's what CR is for: helping you see those behaviors that crept into your arsenal of protection that work against you.   

I pray for enlightenment and recovery.
DHD

[BeautifulCrazy]

I just signed up for 12 weeks of Celebrate Recovery at my church.
It starts next week.
I am terrified about what I might find and have to face in myself.

[thedoghousedweller]

BC, it's a mystery adventure.   In time, you will find those issues that have been holding you back in ways you never realized.   I pray you will stick with it to benefit.   
DHD

[Mary]

Mary, excellent work.   That's what CR is for: helping you see those behaviors that crept into your arsenal of protection that work against you.   

I pray for enlightenment and recovery.
DHD

This means so much to me.
Thank you,
Mary