Step kids influence?

[Heavyhat]

I am curious about people's experience with your step kids' who are children of  an NPD parent and their influence on your bio kids.

In my case, my SD10 (daughter of NPDBM) brings a lot of anxiety into the house and tries to control my middle son. They are very close and get along great most of the time but his self esteem is struggling.

I am working on boundaries and heart-awareness with both of them, but I see this being a continuing issue for us.

[Latchkey]

Hi Heavyhat,
I don't know much of your story or how long the time the kids spend with eachother. In every family, blended or not, a child with high anxiety will affect the dynamics.
When I was actively step parenting I found this book to help me be better at parenting kids with intense emotions which it sounds like your SD might have. Hopefully the anxiety is under control for her generally, remember it is tough for her too.

There is also a chapter on how the other kids are affected.

Parenting a Child Who Has Intense Emotions: Dialectical Behavior Therapy Skills to Help Your Child Regulate Emotional Outbursts and Aggressive Behaviors Paperback – November 1, 2009
by Pat Harvey ACSW LCSW-C (Author), Jeanine Penzo LICSW (Author)

I hope this helps some. If you post more details like the age of your bio sons and your step kids and how often they are living in the same house, maybe there is more we can offer to help you navigate this situation.

Latchkey