I'm in the hospital, uPDM burst out laughing

[Thru the Rain]

The title really says it all. I was admitted to the hospital last Thursday and I'm still here a week later.

I was supposed to be at a big family gathering for Dad's 80th birthday. I was greatly looking forward to seeing my extended family and celebrating my Dad.

When I called my parents to tell them I might not make it due to being in the hospital, uPDM just burst out laughing. Then yelling across the room to my Dad "Hey Thru the Rain's in the hospital." Laughing like its the funniest thing she's heard all day.

To put it in context, I've had to opt out of similar family gatherings due to hospitalizations. I have a very serious chronic condition and I would much rather be well. But to my uPDM, it's just "funny" that this has happened to me again.

I often feel like uPDM sees me as a TV show. A sitcom where it's OK to laugh at the "bad luck" character when their signature bad luck occurs.

I felt so hurt and upset. I do have other family who are being supportive. And I've been talking with my Dad, who ensures he's far away from uPDM when we talk.

I haven't spoken to uPDM since that first phone call, and I have no plans to talk to her. I may never talk to her again.

I'm getting signs from other family members that uPDM is now feeling sorry for herself (certainly NOT sorry for treating me in such a discarding manner.) No one has been a Flying Monkey - I think they've all seen through her, and she's not going to get sympathy or much patience over this.

Not sure what I'm asking for her, just a place to put my thoughts and here what this wonderful community has to say.

[SerenityCat]

I'm so sorry. Your uPDM is behaving badly. Good to hear that you have other family that is being supportive.

This is time for you to focus on your own well being.

In your situation I would need to stop talking with uPDM, probably for quite a long time. I'd focus on folks who are supportive and friendly. I'd do what I can to help make the hospital experience a little easier - watch comedies etc.

[Andeza]

I'm sorry you're in the hospital, thru the rain. Hospitals, well being stuck in them anyway, suck. I hope you feel well/recover enough to get home soon.

I'm also sorry your M Treated the situation with such extreme disrespect and lack of empathy or sympathy or any normal mom reaction for that matter. 

[Amadahy]

Feel better soon, TTR!! Sorry about your mom's inappropriate behavior. xoxo

[appaloosa]

Wow--what an off the charts bizarre reaction from your M. I think I'd cut communication with her for a while--you don't need that, esp while you're in the hospital! Hope you're discharged soon!

[LoverofPeace]

Hi Thru The Rain,
I am sorry you are in the hospital due to your condition. 💐

Though we are here to learn about NPD, your mother's reaction nevertheless is sickening and unacceptable! 😡

You have every right to let her know how you feel once you are back on your feet. I would tell her in a chilling way as to not give her any narcissistic supply and in order to scold her like the immature creep she is. 🌨️

Glad that it sounds like you have support with the rest of your family who can see through how crazy sounding she is. 👽

That's unlike me, who is currently outnumbered by FOO narc members. My circle's small after losing too many good family members. 💔

Try not to spend too much time dwelling on her. You have a right to peaceful healing. 🕊️☮️

Trust me, I've had creepy reactions from the narc sis when I was laid up in the hospital one time. Still can't believe the sorry things that come out of their mouths. 😲

Blessings to you in your recovery! 🙏

[WomanInterrupted]

I'm so sorry you're in the hospital and hope you're on the mend, so you can get back to doing the things you love! 

Your mother's reaction actually made my jaw drop.  How disgusting and *totally* inappropriate!

What kind of a "mother" does that!? 

Oh - yours.  And unBPD Didi, who never met a bit of schadenfreude she didn't love to bits.   

Smirked when I was upset?  Yup.  SMILED when one of our cats died, very unexpectedly?  Check.  Didi took *pleasure* in the misfortune of others - especially mine.   

You said you have a tendency to become ill around family events - I'd like you to consider that your body knows something you don't and is trying to *protect* you, by reacting so strongly, that you wind up missing the event.

The mind and body are amazing things, and may be working in tandem, on a level beyond comprehension.  Something *deep* inside you wants you kept safe, and away from the PDs in your life.

I wouldn't directly address the issue, as LoP, suggests - I'd do it in a more passive-aggressive and sneaky way, by referring to her now  by her new nickname:  Chuckles.