Do you have to hide things you throw away?

[Thru the Rain]

This is totally my uPDM.

Growing up, if I threw anything away that might still be "good" (like clothes that I had outgrown, or a book I didn't need), I would find it put back in my room.

When I visit (rarely) I'll pick some of my own old stuff and hide it in the garbage. I'm talking about 40-year old dried up shampoo. That was mine to begin with. And is completely dried out and unusable by anyone. And in the upstairs bathroom that she hasn't gone into in many years due to not being able to climb the stairs.

I made the serious mistake of telling her that I do this and I've never heard the end of it.

Last time she was at my house, I had some package delivered. There was some foam packing that she wanted and she ended up in a tug of war with my DH who wanted to through the packaging away. She had a full-on tweenage-style meltdown, so DH gave it. She put this stuff in her suitcase and checked it in at the airport. She said she used it to fill in a low spot in her mattress. (Because NO WAY would she be able to throw out an old, flattened mattress!)

But on the other hand, she gets mad, she'll intentionally throw out something belonging to the person she's mad at. Usually at my Dad these days but at any of us when my siblings and I lived there.

I don't know what causes this behavior, but I do know it doesn't come from a healthy or happy place.

[Cascade]

Yes, I've done this many times. Thankfully my husband doesn't look through the trash, as far as I know.

My h is not an obvious hoarder but there are small piles and categories of things that he just can't seem to stop accumulating and can't willingly let go of.

This is like like mine too, there are certain things he just accumulates and never gets rid of. He would still have bills from the 1980's if I hadn't gotten rid of them!