New and learning to break free from the fog

[butterflyrainbow]

Hi, I'm Butterflyrainbow. I have been reading the forums for a few weeks, specifically the ones on PD parents and Elderly PD parents.

  I'm sure my widowed elderly mother has an undiagnosed PD. She has been living in a small apartment we built on our home for a few years, and now has serious health issues that I expect will get worse  rapidly in the next few months (liver and kidney failure).  My mother's behavior confuses and frustrates me to tears at times. I mostly err on the side of her being honest about her physical pain, but sometimes I am sure she is exaggerating her symptoms. She talks about herself constantly and shows very little interest in us or our children. She is estranged from my only sibling and several adult grandchildren, and rarely talks to our two adult children.Unless they call her or come visit her.

I was dx'd with major depression and anxiety in the past, so it's very important to me to care for my mental health while I help my mother. I guess that's why I am here, to figure that part out. I have a very supportive spouse of 35+ years validates my feelings and observations. He grew up in a different type family, so I am very grateful that he has helped me when I am confused and upset about the things she says and does,  but at times I think he needs a break, and I feel this is a good place to go for that extra support. We both are to the point that we avoid being with her as much as possible.  We are basically minimal contact and share very little personal information with her.

Thanks for reading. I look forward to getting to know you all more.

[Starboard Song]

He grew up in a different type family, so I am very grateful that he has helped me when I am confused and upset about the things she says and does,  but at times I think he needs a break, and I feel this is a good place to go for that extra support. We both are to the point that we avoid being with her as much as possible.  We are basically minimal contact and share very little personal information with her.

You are in exactly the right place. Welcome to Out of the FOG.

If you haven't checked out the Toolbox yet, please do. You are already in the right boards. An understanding and flexible spouse is such an asset. Well done, you.

I look forward to seeing you on the boards.

[butterflyrainbow]

Thank you 😊
That link was very helpful, I'll keep it bookmarked.

[NarcKiddo]

Welcome. I hope the upcoming time with her is not too awful for anyone, but you are right to suspect that her health will likely deteriorate quite quickly. Sounds like you have already put in place good protective measures (minimal contact etc) and I wish you all the best as you navigate this.

[butterflyrainbow]

Welcome. I hope the upcoming time with her is not too awful for anyone, but you are right to suspect that her health will likely deteriorate quite quickly. Sounds like you have already put in place good protective measures (minimal contact etc) and I wish you all the best as you navigate this.

Thank you for the warm welcome and best wishes. 🙂