Papers today - Tomorrow it's final

[Whatthehey]

Met with my lawyer today and low and behold, my stbxOCPDh has signed the separation papers.  He is no longer stbx but x.  Tomorrow they will be filed with the court and it's all over.  33 years and it's done in a snap. 

Surreal moment.  I felt like there should be more pomp or whatever.  Instead, I signed and it was done.  No rush of relief.  I feel nothing.  Actually I feel like the love, joy and happiness I had felt with him was bleached slowly from me over the years.  Now I am a shell and just trying to keep from splitting into pieces. 

Very anticlimatic for such a volatile marriage.

[Poison Ivy]

Thank you for the update.  I think mixed feelings and numbness are common reactions to this major transition.

[Associate of Daniel]

I remember the day I received the final papers.  I was numb too.

I remember sitting in my car outside my solicitor's office, with the papers in my right hand.

In my left hand was my phone, showing an email from the uNPD girlfriend of my (literally only as of a few minutes before) uNPD exH.

She was requesting (demanding) details of an upcoming medical appointment for ds so that she could attend.

It was surreal. Really, no words can describe how I felt or what I thought at that moment.

And little did I know that it was just the beginning of all the dramas regarding medical appointments for ds.

That was over 6 years ago.

The numbness and shattered feeling went away with time. 

I wish you all the best as you work through this really difficult stage.

AOD

[Spygirl]

Its really wierd, isnt it?

You go into marriage with all the pomp
Go into separation with all the drama and pain

And then its done. Meh.

In your brain you are waiting for all the previous times' emotions. 

It will get better and you will get your "freedom" feeling. You still dont feel safe from drma yet.

[pushit]

I literally started a thread on here months ago about feeling numb.  It was weird, I had some days where I just laid on the couch and watched TV, which is totally not my personality.  It has mostly gone away now, I'm coming back to life but I don't think I'm 100% there yet.  You will come back to life too, just go easy on yourself and give it time.