How to find a therapist that actually understands?

[Penny Lane]

I also have a really great therapist who has helped me truly accept that the pwPDs in my life aren't going to change. She is fantastic and really does seem to understand the patterns.

I found her through a friend who heard some of my issues, recognized the patterns and suggested I start seeing her own therapist. Then, she recommended a really great therapist for my husband as well. If you have friends with similar experiences you might be able to get a local recommendation from them.

[all4peace]

Thanks for sharing your experiences, and I am so glad multiple people in this thread found therapists that helped.

I can see why I had particular difficulty - my npdParent was a retired therapist himself. So I had to start over with new therapists a few times and lie about what npdParent had done for a living, because once my T would hear my npdParent had worked as a T, it really seemed like my personal T would then not believe me as much and sort of side with my npdParent even without meeting my npdParent. I eventually lied and said my npdParent was a retired architect, or real estate broker.

Oh, wow, what a massive trigger. What a huge vulnerability. I can really understand how challenging this would have been, on both emotional and practical fronts.