Are NPD traits typical of your parents culture?

[blacksheep7]

Quote: her brothers got away with everything and the girls had to do all the chores, so she swore she'd never marry an Italian man.

I relate to that very much.  Not Italian for me but pretty close.  I did not marry the XXXX man which would have been marrying my NF's type ,even without the rages.

Too much entitlement, especially in those days.   I was his servant.  My NM could have done some of those  particular chores.

Of course she had to comment '' I knew you wouldn't marry a XXXXX''.  I can't remember if I answered back, too long ago.   I probably did, lol

[2_exhausted]

Seven & Blacksheep-

UBPD mom ALWAYS states she "would never have married an Italian man". And did not...my father was not even Catholic  . How did that occur....

From what I remember....my female cousin & I hated our grandmother . We must have been 3 & 4, or 4 & 5...& would freely stated this. Why? My grandmother did not like us, she favored our male cousins, We saw how she acted. I am certain my grandmother had some sort of PD.. she really enjoyed controlling my mom..

When my grandmother was older, and grandfather dead, my uncles would go to her house to drink & eat. Their wives(not blood related) refused to have alcohol in their houses. My grandmother barely received $350 in social security....how those two grown men would go there & drink & eat steak, while that old woman would eat watermelon, is beyond me. She never complained. My aunt, would buy whiskey for my grandmother.....my uncle( her non Italian husband) would be upset....because he knew who was drinking most of it. One day I must have been there, and my grandmother asked one of her sons to buy a case of beer ( for them to drink 90%), myuncle took $20 bucks  . My mom & aunt supplemented their alcoholism. I really would not have cared if they would have paid for her food, for her to eat...not them...

Oh, this is bringing back so many horrible but true memories.

When my grandmother died, she barely had any money.....but the one son had preceded her in death. When the will was read, per my aunt, she left things to be split 4 ways.....the one son (whom , honestly, won $1million), said, "well xx is dead so we should split it three ways"... :doh ...we are speaking of less than $10k each.....my mother of course was conflicted, her one brother going against her dead favorite brother's son...what to do? My aunt ( probably the most undisordered) said, no we should split it four ways & give nephew xx's share.

When I brought this up to my mom, on how disgusting I found HER family, she denied it....but I knew it was true because my aunt would not lie about this.