I don't know how to handle this - advice welcome

[wisingup]

That you are still willing to do this shows that you are absolutely not a crap human (I acknowledge you feel that way).

Thanks for this SafireJem - I appreciate the validation!

Thanks everyone for this discussion & your advice.

I get to see uBPD mom on Thursday this week & am already a little tense.  It will be a sizeable crowd so hopefully our interaction will be minimal. 

I'm feeling thankful for this community & for everyone's willingness to share their personal & painful stories here so we can learn from each other and feel less alone.  Happy Thanksgiving to all!