Cannot locate a pic of my father & I

[2_exhausted]

Hi,

My father died when I was 11.....40 years ago...and I woke up, and thought I will find a pic of us & post on IG. Typically Father's Day makes me sad. So I started looking through the pics....well uPBD m must have discarded them. What found in albums were pics of her FOO, her former coworkers, my cousins' children....WTH.

Of course she had to discard the pics of us. She hated that I was close with my father. Not that she really wanted to be, because I remember when he was alive, her FOO was always more important than us. I knew at 3-4 there was something wrong with her. She was NASTY.  Sorry to rant, but it just proves everything I knew. Now she is feeble & demented, living with my aunt.

[FugitiveDaughter]

Hi, I'm so sorry you couldn't find a picture. I hope photos will appear soon from a place you never expected.

I can totally relate to this. Photos seem to be something N parents love to manipulate and have a hold of. I wish I had a photo of me with my dad too but so far no luck. My father passed away a few years ago and like you, I was close with my dad. Most of my childhood photos are as slides and the rest are somewhere hidden away. I once asked my mom if there was a photo of me and dad. Didn't think I needed a reason to want one but she always sees this as some sort of a competition. She gave me one where I'm sitting on my mom's knee with my back turned to my dad. It was a silly shot, didn't mean I was angry at him or anything but she loved the pic and gave it to me. The only other photos of me with dad she supposedly could find were some bad ones where we are just conversing and they're taken from an angle where we're both just looking away at something.

I fear every day that she'll destroy the photos. She could have my childhood photos scanned since I know she has a scanner to do that but instead she chooses not to. All my siblings got beautiful wedding albums which she made but with me, she still hasn't done anything to my wedding photos and my wedding was almost two decades ago. When one of us has a big birthday, her Golden Children that is, she makes this lovely memory picture to hang on the wall for the birthday child with scanned photos of their childhood. Needless to say I have never received one. My big birthdays coincide with hers so she conveniently forgets them as the focus should be on her.

At least they cannot take the memories from our head. Even if photos are destroyed, we have our memories.