Did abuse messages stop after lawyer got involved?

[t666666]

I'm wondering if abusive messages stopped from your ex after a lawyer contacted them?  Thank you.

[openskyblue]

Messages stopped when I blocked my exhusband's phone number and routed emails from his address to a faraway email folder — both about 30 minutes after I moved out. My lawyer sent him a letter saying that all communication had to go through him. Worked like a charm. 

[Whiteheron]

The worst of it, yes. He knows he's being watched, so to speak. Anything he puts in writing he knows will be seen by my L. That doesn't stop him from trying to control me as much as he can via text. He does occasionally try to abuse me through the court and his L - threatening letters, numerous affidavits full of falsehoods and lies.

I think it depends on the individual PD though. I've heard stories on here about the PD's continuing whether lawyers are involved or not.

[NoVoice357]

t666666, it depends on what type of NPD your ex is and if he is afraid of lawyers. If your ex is unable to contact you by telephone and the only option is in writing, most of the time it will stop.
As openskyblue said, your lawyer sends a letter to the PD saying that all communication has to go through him. This also means that anything your ex puts in writing can be used against him. DH did it with his PD FOO to deal with legal matters and it worked very well.

[hhaw]

The really scary PDs find ways to call, and message that can't be traced, IME. 

They drive by at all hours of the day and night.  They have friends and family contact you for them. 

It's difficult to document, IME.  Documenting is the key.  Not letting them get away with anything, while you're trying to show the court you're serious about your stance, is important, IME. Courts don't want to hear that you allowed contact IF YOU SAY YOU WANT ZERO CONTACT.  Hold their feet to the fire as best you can. 

[openskyblue]

 

This was the main reason I  blocked everyone in my exhusband's family from my social media when I moved out. I also blocked any of our friends who sided with my ex. I didn't want them to have access to my life, what I was doing, when I was seeing my kids, etc. It was wrenching to do at first, but blocking all these people ended up giving me quite a bit of protection, I think.

[hhaw]

Blocking anyone who sides with the PD should be a no brainer, IMO.

It's demoralizing, and wasteful of precious energy  WE NEED for things we have some control over.

[aybabtu]

I simply got a new phone and phone number, I blocked all of the people that sided with her. I check the old phone every few days and tell those who I want to keep in touch to call new phone.