I think I found a great place. I didn't know the G in Fog was for Guilt and now I am crying again. I cry a lot these days. My 13 year old daughter was found to have BPD in May while being hospitalized for self harm and suicidal thoughts. She was home for about 3 weeks and now shes back in. She started STEPPS 3 weeks ago. The first week, she screamed and cried and yelled at staff and me afterwards. Didn't remember it the next day. Last week, she threatened herself so I hospitalized her so that I could make my house safer. This week, hospital staff will take her and then take her back to her unit. I will be meeting with staff during that time to plan her discharge. I feel like I am so overwhelmed all the time. I feel guilty for poor parenting choices although the therapist tells me I made the same decisions any parent would make and I didn't cause her BPD. I need to know I am not alone.
i am so sorry you are dealing with this. i can't even imagine how difficult it was to try to get her help in the first place- an issue we have in my region is NO BEDS available for serious issues and children have been put in a special area in the locked juvenile facility until something opens up.
i need you to keep reminding yourself daily NOTHING YOU DID OR DIDN'T DO CAUSED THIS. i hope you are getting some respite for yourself and taking care of your needs- even if that means getting your own therapist or talking to your GP about other alternatives to help you cope with the stress-
again- IT'S NOT YOU. You didn't make her like this. take care of you- you can't help her if your own oxygen mask isn't on.
when you are ready to share more we're listening.