When you cannot ask for help

[practical]

I was faced with a very difficult situation and a very difficult decision -- but I couldn't write about it on the boards due to the complexity of the issue and privacy concerns, but I so wanted the wisdom of this group!

What to do?

I settled on looking at some old threads by others that had a similar issue and I had commented in. Why? I thought it would help me to read my own advice to others and try to apply it to my own situation. Turns out that was only a small part of it. Rereading these old threads, it helped me tremendously to see how people struggled with similar emotions, who were similarly torn between what their abused self wanted to do in a kind of reflex and they knew was going to be unhealthy and finding a healthier way, implement it ultimately. And then there were all the supportive comments, the wisdom of other posters trying to help, describing how they had found their way. It was humbling and gave me the strength I needed, I cleaned a lot from it, that helped me with my decision and how to implement it. I ended up getting the support of the group without being able to directly ask for it.

So, if you are ever stuck with needing support but being unable to ask for it, read some threads that are similar to your issue and you might get the help you need indirectly, but no less powerfully. It did work for me.

[bloomie]

practical - I am thankful you found the support you needed at a time you were unable to directly share what is going on. Thanks for this reminder to revisit threads and posts that offer wisdom when faced with a tough situation.

[biggerfish]

I second what Bloomie said.