New job advice

[KeepingMyBlue]

I have finally left a toxic job. I got mostly congratulations, and a few warnings that I'll just get more of the same in the new job.

She's right. But I'm so much more prepared this time. Gray rock works so well when the bully has no power, and boundaries are so much easier to set from the start.

I'm asking for phrases that have worked for you, when reacting to people belittling/bullying/crossing boundaries in the workplace.

One that worked for me was, "I'm not comfortable with that nickname. It's not very professional either." I was forever after "Miss Blue"

All ideas appreciated!
Blue

[bloomie]

KeepingMyBlue - congrats on getting out of a toxic workplace! Woo Hoo! While there are difficult people everywhere - we are not naive - there are some workplace settings that are particularly toxic and what a relief to get out of them. Really love the phrase you shared btw.

A couple of my favorites to inappropriate questions and comments that I learned from Dan O'Connor vids on youtube...

The 3 second stare, radio silence, and then an abrupt change of subject.
"That's interesting. Why would you say that? Ask that?"

I've also learned to pay attention to my nonverbal cues when I communicate as well.

[coyote]

I like the blank quizzical kind of stare, slight shake of the head, and walk away.

[KeepingMyBlue]

I just found the dan o'connor vids! I've been doing the 3-second stare for a while now, and it works on its own sometimes. It also gives you 3 seconds to frame your answer. My "3-second song" was "I know what you are doing, and I'm not fooled." I know now to watch my body language during and hone that tool.

Blank quizzical stare works too. I title that one "Really!?"

I'll be watching more vids, too.

Thanks, Blue