After no contact how long did it take for you to at least heal to a place of peace?
I imagine it's different for everyone. Grieving took a good 6-8 months for me. I was an emotional wreck, sporadically tearful in public even. And while there are still some days, like some weird rash, a bubbling of negative emotions crops up, it's mostly peaceful now. Unfortunately, although I have not responded in months, the ex will occasionally contact me which short circuits my peace for a day or two. Most of the negative memories are not so vivid anymore, they are muffled and blurred... fading. Reminds me of a song,
Strange how someone you once loved
Can become just another person you once knew
Under broken frames and years of dust
I fear all that's left of us
Are sepia smiles and faded blue
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vfDRwpe8xwU
Sometimes I lay on my bed with the orange salt lamp (nice glow) and there will not be a sound... I enjoy that. No conflict. No negative emotions. Just a sort of nothingness.
I feel my life is somewhat in shambles. I'm having to rebuild, and I am sheepish and insecure about having to start from scratch, but having a plan for a brighter future has given me busy work. Small victories of achievements.
Life is short. Take care of yourself. I hope you find peace soon.