I only found out he was getting married about two weeks ago. When I did, it hit me like a ton of bricks. I'm still processing the emotional weight of this, because deep down I would love to have a brother and be able to go to a wedding and enjoy it and feel supportive. But I know the dark realities of what went down last night, and I could not be a part of it.
I'm also really sad because I think I have now given up hope for my siblings to ever heal. I know how long it takes to heal once I came Out of the FOG, and for a while I had hope that my siblings would be okay. But every day that goes by the hooks penetrate deeper into their emotional Supply, and this wedding might have been the death blow for my brother's chances.
So yeah, I'm really depressed today and down and trying to be kind to myself and not fall into despair. The worst of it is over, now I can slowly grieve and move on. I have a good life and I know I'm doing the right thing, and that's all I can focus on for now.
So sorry Newlife,
Such a heavy weight. We so desperately want things right and nice and fair. It's always especially hard when it's such a huge momentous event. It leaves you with that hung out to dry feeling. I'm glad you are taking care of yourself, and please don't fall into despair. My thoughts are with you. Hugs, Adria
:yeahthat:
My thoughts are with you too. It's normal to grieve and it proves you're coming Out of the FOG. It hurts though -it's a bit like being born again to a new life, which of course, is your name! 🥰😍 :thumbup:!
Sorry, wondering what it is that went down? I have some interesting past pd family wedding situations, but no idea if they are relevant to your situation...
Your last comments about being kind to yourself and not falling into despair are good ones. Please continue that. Weddings are emotional and triggering but after the actual day or event, the normal routine continues.
If we could choose, we would likely all have opted for close relationships with our family and to experience the joy of mutual support and connection. However, we are on this current path because that was not actually an option. It is alright. Focus on your good life and your own well-being.
Quote from: Blueberry Pancakes on November 04, 2019, 11:07:31 AM
Your last comments about being kind to yourself and not falling into despair are good ones. Please continue that. Weddings are emotional and triggering but after the actual day or event, the normal routine continues.
If we could choose, we would likely all have opted for close relationships with our family and to experience the joy of mutual support and connection. However, we are on this current path because that was not actually an option. It is alright. Focus on your good life and your own well-being.
Thank you for saying this, it is so true. The wedding took place on Friday, and for the entire week it felt like I was going to die or the world was going to end.....Saturday I was still depressed, Sunday I felt a bit better and now today it's back to normal....so crazy.