Out of the FOG

Coping with Personality Disorders => Dealing with PD Parents => Topic started by: Ariel on November 24, 2019, 12:51:36 AM

Title: Will you be my neighbor
Post by: Ariel on November 24, 2019, 12:51:36 AM
So just went to see the movie Will You Be My Neighbor, totally caught me off guard. Brought up memories of a family not there. But more importantly how much we need someone to just listen and care.
Title: Re: Will you be my neighbor
Post by: Ariel on November 24, 2019, 12:52:21 AM
Want to add most people I think get this from parents, I didn't
Title: Re: Will you be my neighbor
Post by: looloo on November 24, 2019, 12:14:14 PM
I’m really looking forward to seeing this movie, especially being right smack in that generation of people who were pre-school age when Mr. Rogers was on.  His gentleness and steadiness, and sincere interest in the perspectives and experiences of being a very young kid learning their way around their world (their “neighborhood”) was just...lovely. 

My parents actually bought me two of his albums and I’d listen to them a lot.  Funny how my extremely dysfunctional parents could still intellectually see the value in Mr. Rogers.  But I tend to think of them as very cerebral types of PDs, so it makes sense in that way.  The “emotional intelligence” part of Mr. Rogers’ philosophy I think went straight over their heads.
Title: Re: Will you be my neighbor
Post by: NumbLotus on November 24, 2019, 12:40:02 PM
I had a stable and secure childhood but Mr. Rogers meant the world to me. I am hearing impaired, and while Sesame Street had crazy bouncing puppets whise lips I could not read and whose screeches I could not follow, Mr. Rogers spoke slowly, directly at the camera, and developed his topics logically over the course of the episode.

I felt really safe with him even though I didn't feel particularly unsafe in my childhood. I defintely thought about the topics he covered, even at my young age.

I entered hell 3 years ago, and a couple years ago I started watching him again on YouTube to calm myself after H would go volcanic. Unfortunately, I had to stop after just a few times. When he would say something kind *to me* ("I like you just the way you are") I could not handle it. I cried and cried and it did not feel good, and just typing this brings tears to my eyes.

I switched to Bob Ross, which was perfect for me. A nice, soothing male voice who was encouraging ("you can do it") but not too personal.

Maybe some day I can watch Mr. Rogers look directly at the camera and say those powerful words again and have it feel good, not incredibly painful. I sure hope so.

I do plan to take my teen to see this, maybe next week. (Thankfully a theater is in walking distance). She did not watch him as a child but she's watched a few episodes with me around age 13 and she gets it. (She's a huge Bob Ross fan btw).