I've recently checked out some other psychology/counseling discussion boards and it has really made me appreciate what an awesome resource OOF is.
I've learned so much here for a decade now, mainly by lurking. OOF brings together literally millennia of experiences and insights.
Certainly a big part is that people here really get PDs and what it is like to deal with them--that's rare.
What I most love about this board is how respectful, mature and insightful people are. We don't all agree about everything, but we really listen with open minds and hearts, put in our opinions, own that they are ours, don't tell other people what to do and learn from each other. We can be blunt and tell difficult truths with empathy and kindness.
What I've seen on many other boards is a lot of defensiveness, know-it-all-ism, lack of genuine listening and passive-aggression, not to mention not having much of a clue about what PDs are like. Seems like the more a board touts its compassion, the less compassionate it is.
People here strike me as very strong and resilient amidst our pain and weakness. That may be a paradox of dealing with PDs.
So thanks to everyone for being their badass selves! Keep on keeping on!
:yeahthat:
Right?! Thanks for voicing this for us all. Having so many people from differing types of relationships and stages in healing may have something to do with it. There's always something to learn and someone to learn from, whether new or senior members and even if your relationships bear no resemblance at all. It makes my days better, just knowing that in spite of all we've been through our hearts shine out.
Thank you for this post, and for helping us carry the torch. 😎
:yeahthat:
What D&E said.
Another one of the old-time lurkers here. You guys here are absolute legends. :bighug: :bighug: :bighug:
Remember that as the season of Peak Drama descends upon us.
All we have to do is remove ourselves, do not engage, remember to walk away and count to ten (in 100 units of kilometres, months or years, as the occasion requires) and do what is needed to recover and heal.
The drama can't happen if we don't bat the ball back over the court and we don't go to look for it when it rolls down into the gully where the taipans and the crocodiles breed.
:yourock:
i've volunteered here in many different aspects since joining up in 2009 after leaving another board that wasn't run the same way.
to learn and grow with all of you has truly been life changing. i am humbled by gratitude and thank you so much for the shout out :hug:
:yeahthat: to everything said here. No words really. Just that amazing feeling of gratitude and healing. Thank you deeply.
This is an old post but........ :yeahthat: All of that.
I agree, this forum seems great!
as a member of other forums not related to this forum topic, I've seen so much arguing, name calling, and threads locked
this forum doesn't seem to have trolls and/or people prone to causing trouble
And shout out to Admins too 😁
ty so much!
i came here after an exodus from another message board and it's certainly been life changing- both as someone recovering from a uPD parent, a uPD relationship and then volunteering on the admin side of things.
So much credit is due to the moderators and those who have provided content for the website. The tone set by the reference materials here and the thoughtful forum rules go a long way. Many thanks also to the veteran posters who do so much to create a positive culture here.
I'd also like to add a huge THANK YOU to all of the moderators and contributors on this forum. Before coming here I had spent close to ten years in another forum but got discouraged because it was poorly moderated. Threads often devolved into political fights and other things that just weren't helpful.
Finding this place has been a true life-saver. Every time I post I get so many wonderful responses, all from caring people who really understand. This forum has helped me more than any book or therapist ever has.
A huge hug to everyone involved in making this a safe and welcoming place. You are all amazing!
:bighug: