This is huge progress for me and it started slowly this year.
This week, I decided to stay home and just chill with the family dog. Narc parents wew home (I think they have agoraphobia because they never leave far from home or for long periods of time) Of course, they started fighting as they always do and I decided to just up and leave instead of listening to their bullshit.
I didn't justify why I leave and didn't give any explanation. I just left.
I also cut a friend who seemed toxic and extremely invalidating.
I've erased TV shows that portray controlling, manipulative or narcissistic mothers (you know those shows that have a mother character who's weird or quirky in a more controlling way but who is, in reality, a narcissist. Media should stop giving attention to these horrible excuses for a mother) and I have emotionally cut myself from the family. They have no clue what my plans are and who my friends are.
I also don't hang out or have discussions with my siblings.
We all know that we have no relationship and pretending that this is not true is a waste of our time. I have accepted that I've lost my brothers to NM and her cruelty and that's how it is. I don't wanna fix this and I am OK living with this reality for the rest of my life.
I also went on a healthy diet (no sugar, no carbs, no gluten) because I was miserable on the normal diet (loads of carbs, sugary foods, meat..etc)
I'm getting better and slow progress is better than no progress.
Remember that next time you beat yourself up for not healing fast enough or not doing enough things for yourself or others.
We are changing every minute, we're not the same person we were yesterday-it's a cliche, I know, but I found it to be true.
xoxo
I'm impressed, this is all good progress in rejecting things that make you feel bad!
QuoteI'm getting better and slow progress is better than no progress.
Remember that next time you beat yourself up for not healing fast enough or not doing enough things for yourself or others.
We are changing every minute, we're not the same person we were yesterday-it's a cliche, I know, but I found it to be true.
So true! One day at a time :yes:
Good for you! You're so right that we progress slowly and any progress is great progress when moving away from toxic relationships.
Djuna
I finally gave myself permission to quit movies or shows I'm watching. Not just ones that feature quirky (manipulative) parents, but anything I'm not 100% enjoying. When I was young I felt obligated to stick with something because it was highly rated or popular. I'm also ignoring the voice in my head that says I must force myself to eat all of something because food can ever be wasted. The stale cereal and three day old mashed potatoes can go in the trash. I've also quit heels and any shoes that I can't walk a mile comfortably in. It doesn't matter how cute they look in the store. The other day I saw a woman walking down the street barefoot, carrying a pair of flipflops. Funny how you never see men doing this. I think I have always pushed myself to seem the opposite of my family.