Medical stuff etc

[11JB68]

It's been a week. uPDh had a dr appt this week and I allowed myself to believe that he was finally motivated to follow through and work on an ongoing medical issue that severely restricts our lives and causes him pain.
Well he got an xray and was referred for PT. Of course now he doesn't want to do that. And the ongoing narrative includes the usual: Dr isn't good enough, they should just do what he (updh) wants.... essentially somehow it should all be easy for him and someone should wave a magic wand or something.
I honestly don't know how much of his pain and somatic complaints are 'real' and how much might be psycho-somatic and/or malingering
I no longer argue, cajole or try to make him do anything
Mostly my responses are pretty much – your choice, you can do a, b, or c...etc.
As much as I complain, I know that he does have deep emotional issues that he needs help with. Without that he cannot do what needs to be done. He cannot handle: stress, changes to his routine, anything in 'public' where he feels awkward or embarrassed. Personally I cannot imagine living like that and would seek therapy but he won't do that either as per above.
Everything to him is stupid, a waste of time, a waste of $$ etc.
Or the professionals are not good enough.
I should not have allowed myself to think that he was actually motivated to work on this. It's exhausting and disappointing. I took a day off from work to go with him to help him with this and now I feel like it was wasted.

[square]

I hear ya. I think I've stopped believing him when he says he'll do something and then find myself still being a bit let down when he didn't. (A lot less than before, though).

Has he ever had a moment of clarity about his maladaptive approaches to his health? Does he know why he resists taking responsibility for it? Was just curious; don't think it would change anything.

[Cascade]

Hmm, my husband has a medical problem, nothing serious but it bothers him. He's been to two different therapists who believe they can help him, if only he'd do the exercises they prescribe. He does them for a few days, and then quits. I think he wants a magic pill.

[11JB68]

Meanwhile, Updh, who just a couple months ago barked at me then guilt tripped me for expecting him to take a few seconds to wipe a spill on the counter ("I can barely stand")... Did 5 hours of yard work on Sunday, another two today.... Hmmmmmm.....