Wanting to get things done but they never do.it

[Prototypian]

I'm the person who has to give in.   My spouse doesn't want me to do the dishes.   She hates it; hates how the dishwasher is loaded and is petrified of me doing the dishes.    After promising to do them for five days I finally had to give up and just do them.   The tough part is that I'd rather do them a little bit at a time and I wind up taking an hour to do piles of dirty dishes. I don't actually care about the fact that I have to do them.   I care about the fact that the dishes are done.   

I hate having to wait for days and then give in and still get in trouble.   

I think her behavior is the perfectionism and OCPD.   I hate the house smelling and being embarrassed when people come over.   She watches like a hawk to make sure no one is trying to do the dishes.   

I'm so tired of how we live.   

[SonofThunder]

I'm the person who has to give in.   My spouse doesn't want me to do the dishes.   She hates it; hates how the dishwasher is loaded and is petrified of me doing the dishes.    After promising to do them for five days I finally had to give up and just do them.   The tough part is that I'd rather do them a little bit at a time and I wind up taking an hour to do piles of dirty dishes. I don't actually care about the fact that I have to do them.   I care about the fact that the dishes are done.   

I hate having to wait for days and then give in and still get in trouble.   

I think her behavior is the perfectionism and OCPD.   I hate the house smelling and being embarrassed when people come over.   She watches like a hawk to make sure no one is trying to do the dishes.   

I'm so tired of how we live.

Jsinjin, im so sorry you have to live this way. Im a bit ocd and having to live with ocpd would be intolerable for me.  I wish you swift resolutions to your predicament.

SoT

[Lauren17]

Oh, the battles over the dishes. My stbxh (not ocpd, but uBPD) set up the same no win game regarding the dishes.
I finally stopped playing. I set myself a time I would do the dishes and I did so. I just let the rage wash over me.
It's not an ideal situation, but it eliminated one game.