I took over today

[Prototypian]

My spouse has uOCPD and it's a severe case of it.  The whole enchilada of perfectionism, rule following, massive issues "everyone should be upset about" and hoarding.   We have been on a vacation skiing.   Today was the last day and checkout from the Airbnb.   There were two legit issues: 1) it's about 10 hours to home and there was a severe weather outbreak along the way and 2) there is a list of things to gather up and do in a notebook left by the Airbnb owners for checkout.

I woke up early and before there was even a discussion I hauled 99 percent of the trash and recycling down to the bearproof dumpster garden at the edge of the ski resort.   This would normally be a severe issue for her as she has deep concerns about trash and in therapy she has said that the main reason is she really doesn't like it to seem like she is "somehow above the people who collect the trash so she is determined to follow every rule".   There was clearly anger and a few questions about how I sorted and she wanted to see the dumpsters to make sure I was telling the truth but that's way better than the likely long term issue of her agonizing over types of paper and recycling stuff.   I probably got one or two things wrong!

Second, one of the statements was to place sheets and towels at the foot of each bed except (and you can see the flaw here) some of the bedrooms shared a bathroom so there was INTENSE agony and fear and phone calls and texts to the owners about what to do with an extra towel since it could go to either bedroom.   Also, the travel goes out through a canyon and she is a fiend about weather and driving.   She will drop to less than 10 miles per hour if she deems it "unsafe".   So while she was reviewing the rules and discussing with the owners what to do with the un assigned towels I jumped in the driver's seat and got the teenagers loaded.   She said "oh I was going to drive" and I said "naah, I've got it".

For me it was an easy drive and for her it was that constant white knuckle and stomping the pretent brake and concern over and over about whether we needed snow tires (the roads were DRY but there were flurries).

All in all it was a good ski trip.  I just can't imagine as usual, how someone can live like this where there is legitimate anxiety about what room to put a pile of towels and sheets in for a cleaning service to gather up, wash and put back or living in continuous fear of falling off a mountain during a few wispy flurries at 38 degrees.

But I did not let it get me down and I believe nothing I did was in malice.

[SeaBreeze]

and I said "naah, I've got it"

Love it! You go, Jsinjin. Yes, you've got this one. 

[Cascade]

Good for you Jsinjin! Hope you enjoyed your vacation.

[notrightinthehead]

Congratulations