Reporting a neighbour

[Marianne]

Wish me luck.

A 70 y/o neighbour who seems to struggle with narcissism, harasses all the women here. He tells everyone he is Gods gift to women. But all the women are bothered and scared by him.

He is often in the local coffee bar. And often comes in drunk, harassing even the interns (18 or 20 year olds). He tries to hug or kiss them. A few women don't come there anymore. He says a "crazy woman" got a no contact order because of stalking against him.

With me...he invites me to his home. He tells me I'm surely not interested in men, or I would have seduced him. He wants to buy me expensive clothes, because he thinks my clothes look to poorly. When I say no repeatedly, he says I'm an idiot. I've told him off a billion times. Also harshly.

Now we sat in the coffee bar. And he told me he always keeps track of me. Seeing how I live. He thinks I live strangely. He said he saw I always slept with a closed window, which was stupid. And that I went to get groceries in the morning, and ate while walking in the streets, which annoyed him majorly.

I told him to quit tracking my life. He said he couldn't help himself.

He then told another customer: "she thinks I'm tracking her". Me: "no, you said you were tracking me." The employee said: "yes, and that's illegal. You can be reported for stalking." He immediately started to insult me. How I was clearly insane. Everyone attacked him. Saying he always did this to women.

The employee said: if you report, I will support you, I heard it. I called the police. And reported on him. Wish me luck. I'm a slight bit scared. But I think someone needs to speak up for all the women he's harassing.   

[bloomie]

Marianne - this has to be very tough and yet you are taking strong action to protect yourself and speak up against this stalking behavior toward you. Take very good care of yourself through this and let us know how you are!

[Marianne]

Thanks. I'm not scared. But he is harassing multiple women in my area. Even teen girls. The staff of the local coffee bar was supporting of me. He is bothering all their customers. Somebody needs to speak out.

[lkdrymom]

Why didn't the coffee bar report him after a couple incidents?

[Marianne]

No clue. Soft social worker attitude? 

It's a social work place. With "normal" visitors. But a policy that everyone is welcome...even with severe addiction or misbehaviour or whatever. There's a lot of troubled men visiting. Which is well-intended. But not okay when women aren't protected. Imho. 

The 20 y/o intern just told me he offered her a car, if she'd start a relationship with him. She called him a pedophile. But nobody reports it.    They said they had already decided with the staff, to speak up to him more harshly. But...the guy is seducing teen/early twenty employees...and has a record of stalking women...which I'd think needs a bit more than saying: ey, don't do that again, ok?

I've been sexually harassed by one of their volunteer staff (hand on thighs and butt, explicit sexual remarks, despite me clearly stating boundaries). I reported it to them. And they didn't do anything.

[bloomie]

Marianne - maybe it is best to stay away from what seems like an unsafe place for women?

[Marianne]

I decided to do so. It's where all the neighbourhood meets though. And they do many good things too. So it's a shame.