Jerry Wise and letting go. How we remain stuck.

[Hilltop]

I have written a few posts lately, trying to just clear this mud off of me.  I kept posting that I feel stuck.  I have watched a few Jerry Wise you tube video's and found a few where he talks about this feeling of wanting to let go and yet not being able to.  Like feeling stuck.  He explains that even though you are telling yourself you want to let go and you understand the benefits of letting go that in truth there is something inside of you that is benefiting from not letting go.

He explains this as in reality you 49% want to let go but 51% don't want to let go.  He says we often tell ourselves all the reasons that it is good for letting go and we understand it.  He says we really need to ask ourselves what are the downsides of letting go.  What are the downsides of letting go of the anger, hurt and pain for that person.  He also talks about intentional funerals.  I have found a few photos' and plan on holding an intentional funeral after I have gone through the rest.

I have started doing this exercise and it was really eye opening as to what I do get out of staying in the pain/hurt of the past.  There were some really hard self truths which came out.  I was also reading "Not good enough" by Karyl McBride and she does go through creating a self nurturing mother for yourself which is useful for self soothing etc and has been extremely beneficial for me, and then she goes on to finding yourself but I feel that the missing link for me was this 51%.  I cannot move forward if there is a deep part of myself that doesn't want to let go.  I didn't know it was there until I watched this video.  I plan on watching a few more video's as they are very beneficial.

So for anyone else stuck, check out his you tube video's.  I plan on working through this and then I will go through the intentional funeral. 

[Boat Babe]

Spot on Hilltop. I was having a conversation with myself two days ago, telling myself that the past is the past and that the only person hurt by my resentment is myself. I've carried that resentment for years but haven't to yet let go of it, even though it is an ugly thing. What function it has is worth investigating. Thank you.