Is this chronic sickness, or could it be Munchhausen's?

[P]

For the last few years, I have been dealing with someone who seems to have everything wrong with them.

I'm starting to wonder whether symptoms that may come from anxiety, a need for attention or something else - almost like their body is creating symptoms.

Mental health/neurological diagnoses: Borderline, Schizotypal, autism, c-PTSD, epilepsy, anxiety.

Physical diagnoses: Gastritis, IBS, Arrhythmia, kidney lesions, Repetitive Motion Injury and is currently awaiting results for heart monitoring.

Plus, hypersensitivity to smells, allergic reactions to lots of everyday items, weird numbness in limbs and chronic irrational phobias.

I am frequently helping them to attend doctors and hospitals for check-ups and scans and assessments, but there have been times my eyebrows have raised at certain inconsistencies - for example a chest x-ray to check their breathing problems came back all clear and an endoscope into her stomach also failed to find anything wrong.

However, an ultrasound on their gut did find some harmless kidney legions plus a build-up of excessive gas.

So, mixed results and a medical mystery.

I'm not going to just challenge and accuse someone of making stuff up, because I'm not convinced either way and don't want to be dismissive.

What would you do - is there any definitive way of working this out without potentially making a false accusation?

[square]

I don't think you can know either way in this case.

Autism does include sensory hypersensitivity. That can include sensitivity to the external world (smells, sounds) and internal world (stomach feels weird, etc.).

That doesn't mean it is or isn't Munchausen's, we just can't know.

The bigger thing is, it doesn't matter one iota.

Let's say her issues are all a hundred percent legit. She is still putting them on you in an entirely unacceptable way.

And if they are BS? Same.

For example, sounds may indeed drive her absolutely bonkers. My daughter experiences this as well. But she does not feel entitled to squat in someone else's flat. She doesn't blame me for sounds I cannot control. She doesn't berate me.

She might be a bit short and surly but not mean. Just like "I can't handle this, leave me alone." Headphones on. Or maybe she'll leave for a while.

Her diagnoses and symptoms are not a license to use, control, demean, and abuse you. And certainly not a license to demand anything, much less a home, emotional, physical, and financial support FROM AN EX.

[square]

As another example, I am legally blind with progressive loss, and also legally deaf.

I do appreciate certain types of help where I can get it. I can't navigate stores on my own, for example.

My young adult daughter is still free to move away and find her life. She doesn't have to stay and help me shop. I didn't cause my disability but it belongs to me. Perhaps I would order groceries for delivery. Or perhaps I would seeif a friend would be willing to help me once a month. Or perhaps there are programs that help disabled adults do their shopping.

I would not demand, guilt, manipulate, yell, cry, threaten, or demean in order to keep my daughter under my thumb and providing for me.

And certainly NOT MY EX.

[JR]

i also have what i think is a NPD disordered parent whom seems to have all kinds of illnesses she was just diagnosed with a peptic ulcer and low Iron after numerous doctors tests blood work etc etc neither are life threatening yet everyday another issue arises even before these things are even healed yet. she now somehow has a broken shoulder? and therefore needs assistance in putting on a coat,fastening seatbelts, and has now Diarrhea, stomach pains, vomiting which are all associated with the medicine she was prescribed to cure the ulcer, so the cure seems to be another new illness that needs to be diagnosed and addressed. same as P's mom she has had a CAT scan of the upper GI (found the peptic ulcer) blood test (found low iron) Stool sample found no evidence of anything wrong, although she says she had a Black stool and blood in the Diarrhea all which seems like BS to me. i think they want the attention of everyone working for their perceived illness's, i think it would be best to just dump them off at the hospital check them in and tell the Doctors her supposed illness's and keep her in there as long as possible for all the testing.

[JR]

As another example, I am legally blind with progressive loss, and also legally deaf.

I do appreciate certain types of help where I can get it. I can't navigate stores on my own, for example.

My young adult daughter is still free to move away and find her life. She doesn't have to stay and help me shop. I didn't cause my disability but it belongs to me. Perhaps I would order groceries for delivery. Or perhaps I would seeif a friend would be willing to help me once a month. Or perhaps there are programs that help disabled adults do their shopping.

I would not demand, guilt, manipulate, yell, cry, threaten, or demean in order to keep my daughter under my thumb and providing for me.

And certainly NOT MY EX.

  your my hero love your attitude, i have the complete opposite(mother) of what you stated