Strange Thing

[Maree Rose]

She refused to message or text me for 4 years, yet shows up at my moms viewing last Tuesday. I find it really strange that this friend did not call..message or text about my moms death, yet just breezes in to the viewing.  I truly did not want her there. She totally ignored me for years. 

[Maree Rose]

Ok.  Sad

[Maree Rose]

Please  some input. This is terribly disturbing to me

[Call Me Cordelia]

Hi Maree Rose, I'm really sorry this is disturbing you so in the midst of all of the other stuff you have to manage internally in the wake of your mother's passing. I don't really have a lot of insight to offer to this particular situation without much context to your relationship with this person, but I will say that funerals have a way of bringing out so much dysfunction... and dysfunctional people! Some people get a great deal of satisfaction out of being surrounded by emotion and possibly playing a part in the drama themselves. Perhaps your former friend is one of these, and her presence in fact has very little to do with you. Whatever the situation with her, I hope you are able to get support and care for yourself right now! I have not yet had a parent pass, but seeing other people with complicated or disordered parents go, the grief is likewise complicated.

[moglow]

I didn't realize your mother had passed, and I'm sorry for all you have to be going through as a result. It's hard to handle that, much less an old friend suddenly appearing after years of silence/distance. I tend to give people the benefit of the doubt and would probably assume this person felt the need to simply pay her respects. Deaths have a way of reminding us of time passing, life changes etc. Who knows what she's going through in her life, plus Maybe she just doesn't know what to say, knowing the relationship with your mother.

Try to not read anything into it,you probably have more than enough right now without that.