Crazymaking

[toe2toe]

Hello everyone. First post here. I'm in a quandary: I honestly believe my wife suffers from some form of a PD. She doesn't trust me at all. Told me this morning, after a long night worrying about you I hate you and want nothing to do with you. It's so hard to walk away at that point. I have not been perfect in our marriage. I could have done better but the communication between us, and I would honestly say the one sided communication from her, is toxic. There are kids in the equation unfortunately. I really need help keeping her at bay and could use some advice please.
Thank You

[blunk]

Welcome, toe2toe. I am so sorry that you are dealing with this kind of treatment from your wife.

I would suggest that you look over the tabs at the top of the page, there is a lot of great information, as well as useful resources. One of the things that helped me most as a new member was reviewing the top 100 traits (my bpdxh displayed nearly all of them at some point in time) as well as the Toolbox topics such as what to do and what not to do.

Please feel free to ask any questions you may have, and to share more of your story when you are ready.

[zad7242]

Welcome toe2toe. Your message sounds familiar and I'm sorry for that. I'm a husband early in the process of trying to cope. I have found the people and resources here to be quite helpful. I pray it gives you hope moving forward as well.

[bloomie]

toe2toe - hi and adding another warm welcome to you!  I am so sorry to hear how painful your marriage has become. Thank you for trusting us with a bit of what has brought you to the community.

One of the earliest mantras I learned when first coming here was The 3 C's Rule which says: ""I didn't Cause it, I can't Cure it, and...I can't Control it."



There is a reason this mantra is the first thing you will see when you head to the glossary. It is foundational for many of us to begin to understand to the core of our being that we can only change, control, cure ourselves.

We come here for peer support and to educate and equip ourselves to begin to figure out what does and does not work for us in relationships and interactions with others who are hurting us and then to learn how to live out our boundaries and limits.

She doesn't trust me at all. Told me this morning, after a long night worrying about you I hate you and want nothing to do with you.It's so hard to walk away at that point.

I was struck by this as I read your intro post..I may be misunderstanding, but when told soul crushing things like you describe, most people would step away. I am not saying leave the marriage or anything like that, but I am curious why you would find it hard to walk away at least to regroup and consider what your wife's declaration?

I hope you will take some time to look around and through the resources and conversations taking place. And I hope you will find your time here to be an encouragement to you! You are not alone!