Another Hello-Dads forum

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Another Hello-Dads forum
« on: November 25, 2015, 08:28:30 PM »
I'm more than pleased to have found this forum.  Such a plethora of information out there about PDs and now this refuge specifically for us.  [breathes a sigh]

I'm nearly 30 years into my marriage and I've really only come to the realization that I've likely been dealing with a PD about 6 or 7 months ago.  MIL is clearly BPD/NPD IMO.  Lots of lightbulb moments and lots of WTF was I thinking moments too.  Also lots of "But you do exactly the same thing you're complaining that your mother does" my head, of course.  My wife might be on the more tame side of the spectrum but there is no shortage of stories that end with the sound of me banging my head against the proverbial wall....and occasionally the literal wall.

My wife seems to be in that particularly foggy area of BPD<-->NPD.  I don't have quite all the shorthand yet but I'm learning more and handling it a little better every day.

There have been some troubling incidents involving my 7 year old over the last few months which has, of course, lit a fire for me to pump up the learning process.  There hasn't been anything overtly abusive...certainly nothing physical.  For now, I've had some measure of success quietly steamrolling her in those instances and dealing with the rage later, but I'm reticent on whether or not that will last.  I'm actually just on my way out from work so I'll be back with further details. 

Just wanted to say hi for now.

May everyone have a peaceful Thanksgiving.



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Re: Another Hello-Dads forum
« Reply #1 on: November 27, 2015, 12:09:45 AM »
Hi Wunder_If_Shes_One,

Welcome to OOTF. It's good you found us. Many of us here have realized that not only our spouse is PD but also others in their family as well. Please feel free to also post in Chosen relationships, Committed to Working on it, Common Behaviors, Dealing with PD in laws, as you get settled in here.

I'm not sure what is going on with your 7 year old or if you also have other children but it's important to keep your kids safe and to listen to their feelings and opinions about their parent. None of this is easy so taking things slow and learning about what you are dealing with is important. Please take a look up in the Toolbox for more information.

We are here for you!

Pray for the dead and fight like hell for the living.
-Mother Jones
There is no greater agony than bearing an untold story inside you.
-Maya Angelou
When we have the courage to do what we need to do, we unleash mighty forces that come to our aid.