"Daily Wisdom for Why Does He Do that?" Lundy Bancroft

Started by Mariposa, March 27, 2016, 08:49:26 PM

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Mariposa

I didn't realize Lundy Bancroft wrote another book. I just started reading this book- it's awesome. Covers so many topics / issues. talks about healing/recovery as well as having to deal with a current abusive relationship.

It mentions so many "little" things that were said/done that have negatively affected my self esteem. For example. ex used to tell me how unaffectionate I was. He expected me to make out with him in bars ( we are over 45), expected me to be touchy feely with him.  But because I'm not a "touchy feely" type person, I was told that there was something wrong with me, I'm frigid etc.       In the book, it covers that. Because I feel different about things than exH, exh assumes I am wrong about things since he thinks he is superior in all his thinking and behaviors ( you get the drift)

It's been a real good read so far.

Sunny


irkmandu

Are Lundy Bancroft's books good for men with abusive wives?  I saw a comment on another thread about his book "Should I stay or should I go?", and it looked interesting, but when I checked it out on Amazon the reviews made it look like it was more geared toward women with abusive husbands.
"Rings and other jewels are not gifts, but apologies for gifts. The only gift is a portion of thyself." -Ralph Waldo Emerson

tommom

irkmandu, as I recall (and I haven't read "Why Does He...." in a while) but I think Bancroft says he has treated more female victims of malignant narcissists than male. No one, especially in mental health, would think that narcissists are all male.  (My mother, MIL and SIL are all narcissists, so, uh, no.)

"Why Does he Do That" is an awesome book. Haven't tried this new one, but I'll plan on getting it. Thanks Mariposa
"It is not my job to fix other people; everyone is on their own journey."

HotCocoa

#4
I found this terrific book on Amazon which I am going to purchase:  Daily Wisdom for Why Does He Do That?: Encouragement for Women Involved with Angry and Controlling Men,  by Lundy Bancroft.  It piggy backs off of the book, Why does he do that, inside the lives of angry and controlling men by Lundy Bancroft as well. 
I saw after posting this that Mariposa started a post on this book as well.  Sorry for the double book review post, I look forward to reading it!
The smarter you become about narcissistic abuse, the crazier the narcissist will say you are.

Frozen34

I LOVE Why Does He Do That? Really enlightening. Thanks for sharing about this book as well.