Now my NPD/bipolar ex is telling my daughter I don't have any money..

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really quickly, divorced for over 6 months.  I make 2x what he does and have 2x the obligation for college for our 18 yr old.  My house is probably 3x the amount he's spending for his cheap, shared apartment.  And somehow, I have more money now than I did when he lived here and contributed.  It's absolutely crazy. 

So my daughter just finished her first year of college.  We told her she could be a residence hall advisor her Jr year, and if she did, we would give her what we would have paid for her room & board.  She has a tuition scholarship.

Today she told me that NPD/bipolarexH told her that I was really strapped, and so she should be an RA so *I* don't have to pay.  I told her I didn't have any problem paying my share of her expenses.  She was surprised.  Then she said, "Well he did say that he was not legally obligated to pay me back if I was an RA" (our decree says that we will pay for her tuition, room, board, fees, and books remaining after scholarship).

I'm just so mad that he's being so weasely. 

I suggested to her that she tell him that she wants to clarify everything and meet with both of us at the same time.  That way we could get it nailed down.




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It might not feel like it but you handled it well suggesting that things like that should be discussed all together.
It won't happen but she will learn to always check things out with you from that and other experiences.
We are heading into a new legal shit storm and told the 19 Y/o we were not sharing details with her so she could say to her mother "I haven't discussed it with Dad, so I don't know what they are planning for Youngest." We have said to her she can at anytime ask us and we will tell her if it is not legally privileged.