Projection/Hypocrisy

[11JB68]

Old subject but still gets me when I see it.
uPDh will criticize others for something he does too!
How do they not see the irony here??
Got off phone with FIL and something about 'who knows what's on  his kitchen table, he just throws stuff there and it piles up' (I wish I could attach here a photo of OUR dining room table with uPDh's stuff thrown/piled there!)
This is just one example of so  many

[Poison Ivy]

One of my adult children said the other day that her dad (from whom I'm divorced) had criticized her holey (fashionably so) pants. He is the man who often wears the same clothing for days in a row and has been described as looking like a homeless person.

[IcedCoffee]

And you daren't call them on it! Worse is when you haven't done what they're accusing you of, but they have. I've been told for years by my uBPDw that I was gaslighting her. It was quite a lightbulb moment when I realized it was the other way around!

[losingmyself]

Yes!

All of the above

[SeaBreeze]

Yes. My late uNPD mom. My ex-uNPD mil from first marriage. My current uNPDh. Lots of projection paired with zero self-awareness!

[Cascade]

Yes, my husband once complained to me about a guest looking at their phone while we were eating. Guess who has their cell phone at the dinner table with eyes glued to the screen?

[LemonLime]

My PD has screamed at me that I am "entitled" and "always have been"!!

I was flummoxed.  Why the word "entitled" I wondered.  Out of all the things PD could have called me, I couldn't figure out why the word was entitled.

Til I came to this site.  And found out that PD's are.....Entitled.

Ahhhhhh, yes, all makes sense now.

FWIW PD has also accused me of "triangulating".  I had to look that one up.  Then here found out that PD's triangulate.   

[11JB68]

Updh does this so much it is constant.
His hyperbole about the yard looking a mess, 'like we are heroin addicts or something and we don't care'... Yet so many messes in the house... Dining room table piled with his stuff, piles of shoes in corners, multiple jackets strewn on chairs....