Advice for going NC with HPDs/BPDs?

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Morocha2015

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Advice for going NC with HPDs/BPDs?
« on: November 26, 2018, 02:06:13 AM »
I've decided I'd like to go NC with my HPD mom. I've heard of others having success going NC with NPDs but my mom has made many comments about "I'll never give up on you" etc. It's my birthday today and she called me every 15 minutes for 3 hours before finally leaving a voicemail berating me for not answering the phone. I just know she's going to call, text, send gifts, and just harass me endlessly. I feel a little badly too because I know she's not going to understand it's her own fault and this is going to be painful for her. I just can't put my kids through this garbage anymore. Any advice would be appreciated.
« Last Edit: November 26, 2018, 02:07:51 AM by Morocha2015 »

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Bloomie

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Re: Advice for going NC with HPDs/BPDs?
« Reply #1 on: December 07, 2018, 01:20:42 PM »
Morocha2015 - I am so sorry this slipped down the page a bit. A belated happy birthday to you. I hope your mother's calls/voice mail didn't spoil the day for you. :hug:

I read a bit of your backstory and it seems that you emailed your mom and let her know you didn't want her to contact you any more when she pushed past your declining to spend Christmas with her. And then your dad's cut off response that was painful to you. I am so sorry things have broken down to this point. Especially hard this time of year.

How are you processing these changes in the relationships?  Do you have real life support as you head into the holidays?
Bloomie 🌸

The reality is that you cannot have an emotionally mature reciprocal mutual adult relationship with someone who is not emotionally and psychologically an adult.