1St Court Date And What He Wants

Started by Kat54, January 30, 2019, 12:19:01 PM

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Kat54

We had a Preliminary Conference yesterday with a judge.  What has to be accomplished was put on a schedule including having the house appraised. We go back to court on March 28th. My ex has said he wants to purchase the house and he has a plan to do that.  That has to be included when we return to court in March as the appraisal on the house will be completed. Can't wait to see this plan.

He doesn't have a plan, he's banking on me accepting payments for the house from him, and taking over whats left on our mortgage, that's his plan. My brother who is a judge in another state said he would freak if I accepted anything less than a lump sum payout on the house. I know its financial suicide to take payments, and I'll never have a home.
My ex has also stated through his lawyer there is no way he will be paying me any maintenance. The man has a few sources of income, but says he is disabled??  he had wrist surgery last year and he doesn't have great range of motion. He says he can no longer work as he used to with tools so his business doesn't make much money. My son is his only employee with his business and then he has a government job that pays him very well.

I work 4 days a week at one job and right now living rent free in my sisters summer home, paying my car, phone, a couple credit cards and today I have $10.00 in my checking account.  He has to pay me something, there is no way I'm coming out of this divorce dirt poor. How will I get a mortgage? And when I'm on my own I'm going to have to get health insurance through my employer.

While I'm afraid about the future financially. This was the right thing to do. Guess I rather be dirt poor than with him and feeling stressed out, afraid to speak, afraid to make a move without someone breathing down my neck. Barking and yelling at me. The maintenance thing I am going to fight for. If I find a better paying job in the mean time I would certainly love to not take a penny from him. It would be one less interaction with him.
Yesterday he felt like a stranger to me. Someone you spend 30 years with is now a stranger who you hardly know anymore.  Will always wish him well but my happiest day will be when this is done and I won't have to deal with his nonsense.

oknired7

Oh my goodness. Your situation is similar to mine. My estranged husband says he cannot work and I am the one working full time. I am also struggling financially with a house that is unlivable. Even so, it's better than dealing with him on a daily basis. Most shocking part is that it was me who filed for divorce and he has been fighting it for 2 years. The whole process was dragging on, and I was sick and broke and I agreed to end the divorce, but he suddenly turned on me and said he wanted the divorce.  He fought it in the beginning  because it was my idea. Once I had all but given up, he decided divorce was okay after all. Hoping my divorce is finalized soon, and hoping yours is too. The best advice I can give is to listen to your attorney especially if he understands npd. My best to you. Stay strong.