Starting to feel the FOG clearing......

[Liketheducks]

I've been absent for awhile.   I found myself getting triggered too much.   And, at the advice of my T, I found an ACA (Adult Children of Alcoholics and Dysfunctional Families) group.   I've been going for about 2 years, but just in the last month or so....something finally lifted.  I'm finally just starting to turn my attention to making myself happier and letting my FOO take care of it's own business.    I was raised to be the savior and have fulfilled that role to within an inch of my life.  It's been tremendously difficult - with me feeling like a horrible daughter for continuing VLC/NC.    It's been great sitting in a room with people who have stories just as outrageous and dysfunctional as mine.   Today we had a meditation on humor.   Humor!   I've been so fearful to let go, so hyper vigilant, that I haven't lost enough control to laugh....in SO long.     Today, has been a beautiful day filled with so much needed laughter and joy.      How brave....how so very brave and strong we all are!   Hugs to you all.  You're not alone.

[Summer Sun]

Liketheducks, what wonderful news and you should be commended on your efforts to heal, your wisdom to seek out the best fit for the support you needed.  To feel free enough to laugh, especially at ourselves and the outrageous stories is a good sign of progress for sure. 

The role of savior is far over rated I've learned.  The pay and appreciation are negligent, the demands great, and those we cross oceans for frequently wouldn't jump a puddle for us.  Yes, I too have found that it is time to create my own joy which has meant dropping the rope, letting go. 

Yes, what a brave, strong bunch here, you too!  Wishing you as much joy as your heart can hold and a future full of great big belly laughs. 

Summer Sun

[RavenLady]

 

Hoorah! LOL. And happy weekend to you, too!