A card after almost 2 years NC

[overitall]

Yep, she's trying again....received a card from uBPDsis, stating she would love to see me again soon....so, this is the 3rd time around, but she doesn't realize that I'm DONE....I resumed a semi-relationship with her twice before....she starts out seemingly innocent enough, but as time goes by, she starts ramping up drama and starts confrontation....

Whenever she wants to resume a relationship, she always acts as if nothing every happened before...she literally thinks she can wipe the slate clean and resume a relationship without ever acknowledging anything she has done in the past....the last time I resumed a relationship with her, she contacted me crying about how badly she missed me, etc., etc.  My husband (he doesn't usually get involved) thought that maybe I should give her another chance....I kept it very MC for a long time...when I began having more contact, the old behaviors began.

She has literally ruined her relationship with all of my adult children...they don't want anything to do with her (and unfortunately her child)  It's difficult to understand how a person has zero insight into their behaviors, but then again, she is most likely BPD....

I have had NC with FOO for over 8 years...I cannot believe that these people keep trying...I mean, don't they get it?  I'm guessing that she has burned through anyone and everyone close to her and that she is alone again...UGH!!!

Sorry for the rant, I just can't believe it...I have no intention whatsoever to respond to her in any way....phone number is blocked, social media is blocked....I don't put ANY information about myself out anywhere....I hate having to do this, but it is the end result of having a PD family

[goodgirl]

Overitall, I'm sorry uBPDsis is trying to worm her way back into your life, but CONGRATULATIONS TO YOU for your insight and knowing better than to set yourself up again!  That is a huge breakthrough, and you should be so proud of yourself!

[LemonLime]

I'm so sorry you are going through this.  I think I have a similar situation and just posted about it.    This is apparently the game they play....reel us in and then go back to their old selves when they feel us let down our guard.   You are not alone.   

Their lack of insight is astounding, is it not?  But typical for BPD.   I feel sorry for them, but I also feel sorry for us.
We don't deserve this.   And we would not tolerate this from a non family member.

Hugs

[Dukkha]

good for you in getting away from the FOO
my FOO does the same thing every few years.  After more than a decade you think they'd take the hint.
My PDf likes to use threats, while my PDm likes the guilt trips.  About 18 months ago she sent one that said "I wish we could just share our feelings like we used to"....um....when was that exactly?  LOL

[overitall]

Thanks to everyone for your words of support...I hate that PD's think they can keep intruding in our lives...I mean, really, if you had a former friend who you hadn't spoken to for years, they would probably realize there is no more friendship....PD's just can seem to figure out boundaries....thus, I have to hold the boundaries tight and firm.....UGH....at least my adult kids are free from the dysfunction....

[guitarman]

"If this person was not a member of your family would you have anything to do with them? If the answer is "No" then act accordingly." - Kris Godinez, author and counsellor who specialises in Narcissistic Abuse Syndrome.

guitarman X

[overitall]

Thank you, guitarman....we seem to have very similar sisters....

I feel as if my empathy for her is gone....I have spent the majority of my life trying to help her "deal" with her issues, yet she always tries to turn things around and blame other people....she has not have one successful relationship in her life....she's almost 60....after she burns through whatever current relationship she is involved in, she wants to resume a relationship with me...she's exhausting and I'm just done...it's sad for everyone but I can't help her...