Experience with EMDR?

[BPDParent1]

Hello!  I have been working with a psychologist for quite some time on dealing with my unBPD father and, specifically, learning to set boundaries.  However, it is extremely hard for me to get past my terror of him to set appropriate boundaries.  My psychologist has suggested that I try EMDR as an adjunct to talk therapy.  Has anyone had experience with EMDR?  Did you find it helpful?  How long did it take for you to notice an improvement?  Thanks!

[all4peace]

I have not experienced EMDR but have read about it. It is supposed to be very effective! If you go through with it, I would love to hear your experiences with it.

[Amadahy]

I will soon supplement counseling w emdr and am very hopeful! Studies show marked improvement for those suffering from ptsd.  The VA even covers the cost of this therapy for vets because it has been so effective. Best wishes!

[artfox]

I've done EMDR. I found it very intense sometimes, but it definitely helps. For me, it was a way to disconnect memories from overwhelming emotions, so I could think and talk about things without wanting to retreat from it. Make sure you work with a therapist who's fully certified in EMDR, and not just one who's taken a short seminar on it. It really requires skill to do it well. Good luck!

[carrots]

I haven't done EMDR. My T ruled it out in my case and uses less intrusive trauma therapy methods. For some people, it can bring up too much, too fast.

For further view points on EMDR, you could also check the sister website Out of The Storm. You could try this board https://cptsd.org/forum/index.php?board=106.0 or just do a Search because comments on EMDR may be in members' Recovery Journals and who knows where else. Lots of members on OOTS are or have been in EMDR. Good luck with whatever you decide.

[Call Me Cordelia]

I've been going to EMDR for a couple of months now. I'm noticing a lot less of that negative internal dialogue, and the hyper vigilance and self-consciousness that has plagued me my entire life has toned waaaaay down. I feel more in the present moment instead of compulsively running through my to-do list or feeling like I ought to be spending my time doing something else. I used to say to my husband all the time, "I'm failing at everything!" that improved with CBT, but with EMDR I don't even think it anymore. I can enjoy my friendships and trust and believe that people actually do like me!

On the outside I probably don't look or act too different to the casual observer, but a close friend said recently she's noticed I have a genuine joy about me that wasn't there before in the last month or so. My life circumstances haven't changed, and in a lot of ways have gotten more stressful. I do think the EMDR has a lot to do with it.

It can be intense. And even super weird. It feels to me like having a dream, starting with something real. You're simultaneously in the past and in the present, passive and active in your own mind. I can feel tired out or immediately better after a session. Last time we unearthed an important piece of the puzzle toward the end of the session and I just had to cry the next morning.

It's not for the faint of heart, but in my experience and in all the literature I've seen it works! Best of luck to you.

[Some One]

I've used it for trauma work and the issues with my parents.
I found it helpful. 
For me, the results developed quicker than any form of therapy I used.  I would say I noticed a difference after every session, between the sessions...depending upon what we talked about.  The changes would be subtle...you'd notice a shift in your thinking or a change in perspective.  Something would click that never had before and *poof* something that you had been ruminating on for years would be gone.  I think I did EMDR for about a year until we ran through most of the core beliefs I had written out at that time.

I would say that I found the actual act of doing EMDR in therapy odd.  Sometimes I felt nauseous during it and like others have said it can be very intense.  The intensity made me uneasy at times and  I'm the type of person who does not like getting upset in front of their therapist.  That bothered me.  It's very different than just sitting and chatting that's for sure!

[BPDParent1]

Thank you for all of the responses! I am very hopeful and will update once I start!

[Dinah-sore]

I've been going to EMDR for a couple of months now. I'm noticing a lot less of that negative internal dialogue, and the hyper vigilance and self-consciousness that has plagued me my entire life has toned waaaaay down. I feel more in the present moment instead of compulsively running through my to-do list or feeling like I ought to be spending my time doing something else. I used to say to my husband all the time, "I'm failing at everything!" that improved with CBT, but with EMDR I don't even think it anymore. I can enjoy my friendships and trust and believe that people actually do like me!

On the outside I probably don't look or act too different to the casual observer, but a close friend said recently she's noticed I have a genuine joy about me that wasn't there before in the last month or so. My life circumstances haven't changed, and in a lot of ways have gotten more stressful. I do think the EMDR has a lot to do with it.

It can be intense. And even super weird. It feels to me like having a dream, starting with something real. You're simultaneously in the past and in the present, passive and active in your own mind. I can feel tired out or immediately better after a session. Last time we unearthed an important piece of the puzzle toward the end of the session and I just had to cry the next morning.

It's not for the faint of heart, but in my experience and in all the literature I've seen it works! Best of luck to you.

Wow, this is such good information. I am hoping that EMDR will continue to help you, and that this information will help BPDParent1. <3

[marizabet]

I had a good experience with it but it was used mostly to deal with sexual abuse trauma and not so much parent issues.