Don't Know What to Do

[Tricia64]

Hi,

I have posted before here.  I am sorry if I am posting too much.  I am just having such a severely hard time trying to figure out how to deal with my family.

I have been making a little headway with talking to my sisters normally.  The sister closest in age to me and I actually are having a better relationship.  It isn't perfect but she seems to be making more of an effort.

I really now believe one of my other two sisters has very serious issues of narcissism.  It feels awful because we can start to get along and then it just goes south.  Last night we started to get in a political fight and I am getting so sick of her way that I hang up mad and put the phone on Do Not Disturb.

But today my niece texted about going to her house on Saturday.  I want to go because I want to see her and my grand nephew but it is about an hour drive for me.  I haven't been feeling too well.  But I said I would and called my other sister to talk about it.  She answered the phone in this really low voice like something was wrong.  I was like "what's wrong."  I can't even remember her first words but she said something is happening with Iran.  I said you watch all those channels (I never watch news anymore) that make those crazy alerts.  So she said no it is on all the channels.  So all of a sudden I started to think back to 9/11.  I started thinking like "what???"  So I turned on the TV to like channel 5 and the local news was on and they were covering the weather.  So I was like what are you talking about, the weather is on?  Then I turned to like CNN and they had about drone being shot down.  So I was looking at the screen and it said something crazy like "Trump will say later ...."  So I was reading it on the phone to her and read Trump says .... (she is supporter I am not).  I was still trying to figure out if the situation really was serious, and she says almost like something like "I better get off" right after I said Trump like we were getting into a political argument.   I totally flipped my lid and hung up on her.  She hasn't called back or apologized or anything.

I feel like the problems I face are (1) she and my older sister are getting older so I am starting to feel like I am not completely sure if she is doing it on purpose or not.  She has done this kind of thing on and off for years and I didn't understand till I read about this recently.  I am actually to the point where I feel like I could almost hit her.  I know that is wrong but I am recovering from my husband's death, brother's death, etc.  I have severe depression and I have very bad upsetting dreams at night.  I had an awful night last night and woke to her practically acting like we were having a nuclear war.

I watched a bit of it after hanging up.  Again, I am not Trump supporter but he was speaking with Justin Trudeau and he sounded very well reasoned and thinking in the things he was saying.  But more importantly, he wasn't acting like any war was going to happen.  He actually said he thought it was an accident.

So the thing is I feel like I don't even know how she could have interpreted it the way she relayed to me.  But it is so hard for me to believe that she would try to scare me implying there might be a nuclear war.  But I think she did.  And it just occured to me that she told me about some prank where someone did it and was saying it was funny because the women posted on Facebook even when she thought a nuclear war was coming.  I thought the facebook part was funny (as to human nature) but I don't think pretending a nuclear war is starting can or should be ever characterized as a prank.

I am really getting scared and wondering why she messes with me like this.

Also, I am scared to go to my niece's house because I have so much anger toward my sisters.  I am truthfully at a loss.

[nanotech]

I too watch the news a lot less than I did.
I too have family members who like to catastrophize, and they often feed on news events to do this.
It's tiring. It's distressing too.
Remember that you don't have to discuss these topics with them!  No requirement!
Medium chill or Grey Rock then change the subject.
Don't get sucked in on phone calls. Let them rang for  awhile, then try to change the subject. It's not worth trying to make them see how ridiculously overly dramatic and  negative they are being.
There isn't any need for you to put yourself  through listening to it.