Controlling Behavior

[gettingstronger1]

I wanted to share a little story about controlling behavior.  If the situation weren't so annoying, it would probably actually be funny. Someday I will look back on it and laugh.     The background to the story is that in general I don't like the taste of alcohol such as wine and beer. I don't have any thing against it morally. About three times a year I might have a mixed drink. I have never had an issue with alcoholism. So last winter my husband, kids, and I were visiting his parents. His parents occasionally have drinks before dinner. My husband had a beer. I said I wanted the same drink my in laws were having. My MIL turned to me and said "You can not have a drink."  I looked at her confused and asked "why not. "  She looked at me and said because "You will end up dancing on the ceiling."  In my head, I am thinking WTF???.  Where is this coming from?  She has never seen me intoxicated, I don't have any drinking problems, and I am in my late 40's and legally able to drink. She is so controlling she flat out refused to give me a drink. It was just weird. 

Has anybody else experienced any weird controlling behaviors???

[11JB68]

Controlling behavior in my uOCPDh is exactly what brought me to Out of the FOG.
I don't even know where to begin...
Although, the incident that probably really was a lightbulb moment for me was this: he got SO ANGRY the last time I got my hair cut short. Was verbally abusive about it. When I picked up Lisa Fontes book invisible chains, and one of the first examples was THAT....I think I got chills.
He is controlling about most things... The way ds and I dress, wear our hair, etc is a big one. And if he doesn't like it his default position is often that it "looks (or is) 'gay'".
Ugh.

[gettingstronger1]

11JB68

I am really sorry to hear that you are having to deal with that kind of controlling behavior from your husband. You deserve better than to be treated that way. I agree, that it is chilling that his behavior was the same as the first example in the book.  I hope that things get better for you, and you do what you want without being over controlled.

[LadyAmalthea]

Yes! They get controlling about seemingly the strangest things...with my PD landlord/neighbor, it was where I was allowed to hang pictures and what decorations I was allowed to put in "her house"; I had to use her hideous area rugs and place them in the doorways instead of the middle of the room; had to use Mop n Glo only 1x/week and vacuum 1x/week...wasn't allowed to hang different curtains--just very odd things to control given that I was paying to live there and she lived in a totally different unit...

With NPDmil, you name it. We have to practice HER religion around her because she will be eternally damned if she fails to control our religious adherence..she has to have control over what she perceived are our "sins". Once, she forbade my pregnant sil (wife of her oldest son) from going on a ferry boat because she felt it was dangerous, and "not while she's pregnant with MY grandchild!".