Ashamed of extended family

[Saywhat]

When I went NC with my PD parents, I felt certain grief over loosing my mom's entire FOO. We had been close when I was a child, but being religious I knew they would never support my NC decision.

To this day, I've never heard from any of them, not even from an uncle I was relatively close to and who knows about the abuse I went through (I told him about it and he even witnessed some episodes).

Recently, I've started to feel ashamed of many members of my extended family. They preach God's word and believe they are superior and more worthy than others because of their race and religious convictions, but their are lives are fraught with hypocrisy.

For instance, one of my uncles, who was really wealthy and a GC, was sent to prison last year for fraud. Another one married an 18 year old when he was around 40, my aunt, also a GC is totally and unapologetically BPD, to the extend that she threatened to run a pregnant woman over due to a tiny dispute. The list goes on, with my cousins, the generation after them, all being either obese, in code pendent relationships.

The only half sane person was my uncle, who abandoned me when I told him I had gone NC. He must have not been that sane after all to expect me to but up with that crap 

Anyway, it a relief to no longer feel any obligation or ties to them whatsoever. 

[newlife33]

I feel your pain.  I went through almost the exact same scenario. Please be gentle to yourself as you continue, the changes and realizations are complex.  Many people who I thought were there for me or who i figured I would have a relationship with turns out were not on my side or willing to accept my choices.  But I know what is good for me, and will not sacrifice my feelings and truth for anyone who does not respect it.