Dealing with schizoaffective disorder aunt

[cmh]

Hi, I am the legal guardian and conservator for my aunt who suffers from schizoaffective disorder with bi-polar tendencies.  Before she became incapacitated she was the person responsible for paying bills, etc.  She suffers from extreme paranoia and is not capable of fully understanding her finances.  Yet she insists on seeing all the detail and going over it constantly.  Yet when I do try to simplify it as much as possible she still can't understand it or simple math.  I feel it is my responsibility to keep trying to help her understand her money situation and try to ease her paranoia.  However, it is very frustrating and takes so much time.  At the end of almost each conversation she and I are exhausted.  She pretty much is so tired that she gives up...until the next time I talk to her.  Has anyone else had a similar situation?  Any advice? 

[Brooke]

No advice but I wanted to welcome you and say that I can only imagine how frustrating that is for you.

Hopefully someone else will be along soon to offer some advice.

[bloomie]

Offering a warm welcome. It sounds like you are offering great kindness and help to your aunt. In a similar situation with a mother with early onset Alzheimer's and personality disordered behaviors and reasoning I can relate to how difficult it is to move through even normal activities of daily living with someone who is cognitively impaired.

Something that I did is to start with a realistic evaluation of my own mother's cognitive condition. I simplified what tasks I did with her and in the tasks I did share with her I reasoned why, instead of with, her if that makes any sense.

Logic had never gone very far with my uPD often paranoid mother, and now that she was suffering with dementia logic and reason just wasn't going to help when facing day to day challenges. I also reinforced the emotional connection we shared as best I could and continued to show her patience and gentle kindness. Which all went a long way to reassuring her.

There are some great resources for support for caregivers found here: https://www.outofthefog.net/forum/index.php?topic=68854.0

Head on over to our Dealing with PD Elderly Family Member's board and join the conversations there. This is a tough journey and there are no easy answers.  Finding a community like this where you can share and gain support can go a long way to lighten a heavy load. We look forward to supporting you.