Second guessing yourself

[me01t]

How do you reduce second guessing yourself around people after abuse?

[Whiteheron]

I would ask myself where my uncertainty was coming from. It helps me to analyze (it's the scientist in me) and try to figure out, did stbx condition me to be uncertain about x type of decision, was it FOO, is it me? Usually I found it was something that stbx would question my about repeatedly, causing me to doubt myself every time.

I still question myself, but not as much as I used to. It's not as paralyzing as it was at first. What I had to do was basically hold my breath, jump in and do it. Over and over again. Did I make mistakes? Yep. Did I occasionally make the wrong decision? Yep. But I learned from my mistakes and I moved on. I keep telling myself "I'm only human. Humans make mistakes. It's ok."

[athene1399]

  I agree with everything WH says.

[1footouttadefog]

I remind myself that I dont  have those issues with others in my life that at work, and church and social groups I dont have the same results. 

It's easy to focus on the yellow jackets and not see the field of flowers and the forest and stream  and mountain scene beyond.