PD behavior is so predictable

[gettingstronger1]

As many of you may already know from my past posts, I came from a dysfunctional FOO and I married into a dysfunctional family.  My mother had schizoid personality disorder with traits of NPD, and my MIL has full blown NPD.   

I found out today that my NPDmil is doing the same kinds of dysfunctional things my mother did.  My mil is playing the victim and saying I attacked her.  I didn't attack her, I just told her a truth about herself that she didn't want to hear.  I also set a firm boundary with her and she is angry about that.  Nobody in the family has dared to set a boundary with her.  My MIL has also started the smear campaign just as my mother and sister did in my FOO.  I have had a good relationship with my FIL for 18 years. Today I found out she destroyed that relationship.  She hasn't said anything yet to my husband's three siblings, but I know from experience they are next.  I know there is nothing I can do to stop the smear campaign.  The more you protest the smear campaign the the worse you look. I am angry and I am worn out from dealing with both families over the years. It's the same old crap just a different day.     Things should start to get better now that I have lowered contact with my MIL. We have no plans to visit her for the next year.  I have VVLC with my father and no contact with my siblings. My mother passed away several years ago.  Maybe now that I am setting boundaries and removing myself from the situation things will get better and my health will improve.  Thanks for letting me vent.  I am just mentally worn out from dealing with too many PD people.  Like I said in an earlier post, they seem to be everywhere.

[11JB68]

I'm right there with you with the exhaustion. Nc with foo for years, but some exposure with in laws, along with daily struggles at work and with uOCPDh.
It is exhausting.

[gettingstronger1]

11JB68
Thanks for the support.  It is emotionally exhausting and I am sorry you have to deal with it too.

[gettingstronger1]

Sorry to post again, but I need to get this off my chest and put this feeling out in cyberspace somewhere.

What really upsets me is all that I am asking for is basic kindness and human decency. It's not too much to ask.  Why am I viewed as a bitch when all I am asking for is basic human kindness?  Why is that so hard to understand??

[Rose1]

It isn't. Its just that you're not doing what the pd wants and they bring pressure to bear until you do. My exunbpdmil said as much. Big light bulb moment for me. (Yes she was low functioning )

[11JB68]

Oh yes rose1, uOCPDh often says things like:
You could just AGREE with me!
Well just don't do stuff to make me mad and then I won't have to yell at you!

[Boat Babe]

Listen to the 3 year old in that last statement.
Can't see any insight or change on the horizon there. Ouch.
Grey rock and minimal contact are your friends.
And so are we. Huge hugs to you ❤️