I think I can

Started by Roza, November 14, 2019, 11:02:25 AM

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Roza

I believe that I may have turned a corner.  I am starting to Ruminate less.  I am starting to feel better.  I am understanding that I may NEVER get the apology from my siblings for hurting me.  I have gotten past the fact that NARC mom is dead and that option is closed, but I was still stuck about the siblings taking over for her and making me feel horrible.  I had some HOPE that they would be remorseful and feel bad, but that is not going to happen.  They are just as damaged as our NARC mother was.  They never do anything wrong, I was the person who apologized for everyone for everything.   I was the one who was told to fix it all the time.  Well I don't have to do that any longer.  Parents are dead and I want to live MY OWN LIFE now.  I deserve respect and I will be setting boundaries, I do understand that my siblings are NOT going to like it, but I have to take care of ME for once, NOT them.  They are adults and they should act as such.  I know that I am a kind, compassionate, and honest person, despite what they try to say about me.  I am finally taking care of myself.  It still hurts at times that we grew up in a house of nuts, but that they can't see or won't see the pain that was caused and the pain they caused me is disheartening. I feel sorry for them. 

Hazy111

The more you move away from them the easier it gets. Dont get drawn into , " maybe theyve changed . I wonder what theyre up to?"  game . I think many can verify from falling into this trap. Its painful and lonely but Good Luck!!  :bighug:

Adria

Good for you.

Sad as it is, lonely as it is, some things never change.  I'm glad you are moving forward and taking care of yourself. 
For a flower to blossom, it must rise from the dirt.