Its OK if it costs me money but he wont spend a penny!

[Starboard Song]

Oh jeez - how much time can you spend on one small applicance?

The same can be said of a small old man.

You deserve some peace and quiet. You deserve respect for your time. You deserve to feel that this man understands you and respects your interests. Because he doesn't and probably never will, the burden now shifts to you.

Our therapist gave us a rule to follow: my wife and I had to not talk about my in-laws except to make a decision. She noted that it was a terrible shame when we spent more minutes -- even hours -- a day thinking about such people than we did about the wonderful, kind people in our lives. While venting is sometimes essential, she believed we'd become a bit dependent on the trauma bonding we did over our anxiety. And she encouraged us to focus instead on the good things in life.

For what it is worth, you may be letting a weird old man drive you too much. You deserve better. In part, you may get that by detaching emotionally from his demands and requests: saying no and moving on.

Good luck.

[p123]

Gets better. I'm going to start turning my phone off in work..... So hes phoned me

Did you order it? Yes arriving tomorrow.
Are you sure? Yes
Can you phone them to make sure they send it? Not really (this is amazon I'm sure they dont really cater for people checking on their orders that often)
But what if they forget?
What if it doesnt get sent?
Can you tell them I'll be in until 11 then popping out to get my paper? No Dad - tell you what I'll add instructions to leave on doorstep.

5 mins later...
Did you phone them? What did they say? I didn't phone them I added a note.
I was thinking - what if it get stolen? Dont worry it'll be fine.
Yes but I'll still have to pay what will I do then?
Can you phone them back? Tell them to hide it next to my bin? <sigh> I'll change the instructions.

Can't wait for friday.....

Hes obsessed with "checking things are ok". You may remember the xmas meal I took him out on. He stressed the whole time that they'd forgottnen his food, they'd done the bill wrong. He was very rude to the server. He basically wanted reassurance for everything and would not listen to me. (when I said No Dad it hasnt been ages so I expect theres no problem, and no Dad I've checked the bill its fine).

I could write a comedy sketch based on the amount of drama from one amazon order lol.

[lkdrymom]

Friday can't get here soon enough.

I know what you are saying about the reassurance. It gets old and tiring after awhile.  My assistant at work will be 70 this year.  While that is not old I have seen her decline over the past 2 years and she is starting to "act old".  We have shared a tiny office for the past 5 years but this week the higher ups moved me to a much bigger office next door. But they decided to leave my assistant in our old office.  Instead of being happy having a space to herself she is beside herself thinking they are trying to get rid of her. I reassured her several times but she just wouldn't let it go.  And I just stopped answering her which set her off even more.  She is the type that will bulldoze to get what she wants and she doesn't realize how off putting that is to others. She insisted that I demand she get moved to the new office with me.....or we should just both stay in the old office.  I like to see people get ahead so this kind of pissed me off that her attitude was that if she wasn't getting this then neither should I.  I felt less bad about moving this week.

[p123]

Friday can't get here soon enough.

I know what you are saying about the reassurance. It gets old and tiring after awhile.  My assistant at work will be 70 this year.  While that is not old I have seen her decline over the past 2 years and she is starting to "act old".  We have shared a tiny office for the past 5 years but this week the higher ups moved me to a much bigger office next door. But they decided to leave my assistant in our old office.  Instead of being happy having a space to herself she is beside herself thinking they are trying to get rid of her. I reassured her several times but she just wouldn't let it go.  And I just stopped answering her which set her off even more.  She is the type that will bulldoze to get what she wants and she doesn't realize how off putting that is to others. She insisted that I demand she get moved to the new office with me.....or we should just both stay in the old office.  I like to see people get ahead so this kind of pissed me off that her attitude was that if she wasn't getting this then neither should I.  I felt less bad about moving this week.

Ha ha good for you!

Dads like a bulldozer too. He wants all the info, he wants it al checked NOW. CHILL is not something Dad ever does.