Hi everyone!

[ilovetacos]

Hi, I've been lurking on this site off and on for the last 2 years and decided to register. I found out about personality disorders around 2-3 years ago after getting out of a relationship with a person that has a lot of npd/bpd traits. When the relationship ended with my ex I was so confused because she left me and yet was trying to hurt me and sabotage my life. I somehow stumbled upon a website describing narcissist people and thought to myself, wow that is exactly how my ex was acting. I found a few more articles about personality disorders and being in a family with one or both parents with a PD and wow did the light bulb go off.

While growing up my father was emotionally, physically, and severely verbally abusive towards me. I always looked at my mother as also being a victim of my psycho dad but I just recently started realizing the role she played in my whole family dynamic. My mother would always tell me to quit being so sensitive, my father is not that bad, he loves me etc. I have a younger sister who would be considered the golden child, who was the perfect child and I really can't remember a time where she even got yelled at. Like most of you on this message board I could write thousand stories of childhood experiences but since this is my introduction I am trying to keep things short.

I just recently in the last month went extremely low contact and with my immediate family and once I get my finances in order will go completely NC and never look back. I am in my 40's and for as long as I can remember I have suffered from low self esteem and low self worth but have made huge jumps in the last year on improving my self esteem. I found a lifesaver of a therapist who has helped me trust and validate my feelings. She has also helped motivate me to go to college and take steps to have the life I deserve and not get hung up and stuck on my traumatic past.

Hopefully I can share some of my stories and experiences and also support others that have also experienced trauma due to knowing someone with a PD.

[FogDawg]

Welcome to the forum. You are in good company. I am glad that you are coming to feel better about yourself, but it's sad that it took so many years. It sounds like you basically know the path forward; it is difficult, but definitely the way to go. Best of luck.

[treesgrowslowly]

Welcome. I think this forum and website will be pretty helpful and fit with what your counselling work is right now.

I have been NC from my family for over a decade now and it was the only way I was going to ever be able to live my own life. A good therapist is a really good thing to have during the work Out of the FOG. So glad you found that support for yourself.

Welcome and glad to meet you here,
Trees

[ilovetacos]

Thanks for the warm welcomes!  It hasn't been easy and I have a long ways to go but I know I'm finally moving in the right direction.